Fletch Lives...Again!?!

Lets get the news out of the way. Bill Lawrence, creator of Scrubs, has been tapped to write and direct "Fletch Won" the much ballyhooed film version of the novel (why is this movie so hard to make? It ain't Spiderman. Its freaking Fletch). Now, I never read any of the novels (Bill Lawrence has and is a big fan of them). My relationship with Fletch begins and ends with the two movies "Fletch" and "Fletch Lives" starring demi-god Chevy Chase.

The movie sequel feels a bit off at times and doesn't really feel at all like the original, but it has its moments. The original movie is a tour de force though. One of the true comedy classics. Chevy Chase's portrayal of Fletch is just mind numbingly good and is still funny today. I suggest you go and buy the DVD right now.

Anyway, the other assumed news is that now that Lawrence is on board, the oft rumored casting of Zach Braff as Fletch is a given. I don't like this at all. Granted, this is based on my belief of what Fletch should be based on Chase's performance. Braff is far too goofy to pull of the suave, ultra-arrogance that Chase had in the role (actually all of his roles). When Kevin Smith was attached he wanted to put Jason Lee in the role, which I liked...but I hate Kevin Smith so it was another quandary.

I liken this to a James Bond situation. Ian Fleming, the original author, hated Sean Connery's casting and didn't like "Dr. No" that much. The movie Bond is quite different from Fleming's creation, but Connery's Bond is considered iconic. I put Chase's Fletch in the same category (which Gregory McDonald, the original author, has gone on record of not liking either). So screw books. I would also like to pre-emptively create controversy for Fletch 5 by saying the obligatory, "I think its about time that we had a Black Fletch! I think (insert hot black actor of the time, Denzel Washington, or Marlon Wayans) would be phenomenal!!!"

Either way, I appreciate that Lawrence is a fan and have faith he will do a good job...if the movie ever gets made. Best pick for Fletch that I have heard so far...Ryan Reynolds.

P.S. I think I have solved the "Chase equation" aka How did Chevy's career go from so good to so bad? A deal with the devil had to have been made in the early 70's for meteoric rise to fame and fortune and a string of blockbuster comedy classics. But like that monkey paw episode of the Simpsons treehouse of horrors, all those deals have unforseen repercussions that make the person regret ever making the deal. Unfortunately for Chase, right about 1985 the "b" side of the deal kicked in and he starred in such an enormous amount of shit that people forgot that he was ever famous to begin with.

Vice Wins Box Office Battle, Probably Loses the War

The good news this weekend is that MIAMI VICE did claim the top spot at the box office and ousted mega-hit PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MAN'S CHEST from the throne after 3 weeks at #1. The bad news is VICE took in just over $25 million which isn't too hot considering the reported budget for the film was $135 million.

I've toyed with putting up a review of VICE on here but the nature of film business is sadly so slanted to the opening weekend that by now everyone essentially has made up their mind whether they will see it in theaters or not. To give the short version of my view the movie is tremendous. One of the better realistic looks at undercover cops. It's not an action film, but the last 40 minutes contain the 2 best action sequences I've seen in a movie this year.

I don't know what it is about audiences that cause them to be largely indifferent to crime dramas. It seems like every week some cheap comedy does decent business. I know youngsters make up a large portion of the movie going public but who in the hell sees an add for JOHN TUCKER MUST DIE and thinks that it's a film they gotta lay eyes on? That movie just made more this past weekend than the film NARC earned during its entire run.

Spot the Weasel is (conservatively) live

In an effort to get these up as quickly as possible, I have once again put up pre-made templated blogs (early Stealing Cable esque) in place of anything refined, so work with me, but not one but TWO Spot the Weasel blogs are now live and here for me to plug. First up is the aptly named "Spot the Weasel
" which is a blog centered around Manimal and other STW work. Second, K105 is our review oriented arm, where you can see the more Stealing Cableistic posts. Since i'm plugging shit anyway, also you can check out our own Manimerchindise and ManiMySpace. For the love of god, buy the yellow Baron von Buttsecks shirt.

Take care everyone.

Television Fall 2006

My name is Kyle and this is the beginning of my second tour of duty as a Stealing Cable contributor. However, despite the fact that I was a member before, this is actually my first post on the site. (thus solved: the mystery of why I was "fired" the first time)

About Me: In general I watch way too much television. However, since the summer began I've laid off the television viewing a bit. I burned myself out watching approximately 20 shows at a time during the fall and winter seasons. Now I'm down to one new show, (and really it's basically a fluff show) The 4400. Rather than talking about that show, I'd rather share with you my current schedule of what shows I'm going to watch. This past year I had a dual tuner DVR, and although I'm changing residences in a couple weeks I feel very confident that I can get one for next year, because it is very important to me. My tentative Fall television schedule is as follows:

We'll begin with Monday where I start off with Prison Break at 8PM. The first season was silly and uneven, but mostly entertaining and I think the second season has some promise to be better than the first, so I'm definitely going to continue with that show. On at the same time is How I Met Your Mother, a bit of a guilty pleasure for me. I can't dislike any show that features Jason Segel in a prominent role and has the two guys who created Clone High as writers. I'll follow those two up with 2 intersting looking new shows, Heroes and Runaway. Both have the potential to suck badly, but the premises sound interesting enough that I'll certainly give them a shot and see how they turn out. Then I'll finish off my night with the new show I'm looking forward to the most (as is almost everyone else) Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. I don't think I really need to go into much detail about that one, but it sure does look good.

Tuesday is almost as packed for viewing as Monday, and introduces my first (and really only) scheduling conflict. At 8 I have Gilmore Girls, constantly one of my favorite shows, although I am still moderatly concerned about them having new show runners, and apparently House will be on the also. That squeezes out Friday Night Lights, which had a pretty impressive preview and a pretty good pedigree. I'll probably figure out a way to record one of those shows on VHS so that I can watch all three. Then I'll follow that up with a show I've been a big champion of from the beginning, Veronica Mars. Although last season faltered a bit in comparison to the first, I like what Rob Thomas has been doing and have faith that this next season will be great, rather than merely good.

Next up is Wednesday, which is not nearly as busy as the first two nights. I actually think there's a good chance that when Lost goes on it's haitus I may not have any shows to watch on Wednesday. But when the season begins I'll be giving 20 Good Years and 30 Rock a shot. I don't have high hopes for either, but I believe they'll both end up being solid, but far from great, sitcoms. And although I'm mystified by people who think Lost is great I do still quite enjoy the show, and I will definitely be counting myself among the viewers next season. I'm also interested in giving Day Break a chance, mainly because Adam Baldwin's in it. The premise actually seems a bit silly to me.

Thursday night, all the biggest show's are on. However, apparently I don't know jackshit because there is almost nothing I want to watch. I'll definitely be watch My Name is Earl and the new best sitcom on television The Office, and I'm going to give 'Til Death a shot early in the season when nothing else is on. I'm also going to try to catch up on the second half of the first season of Supernatural before it's second season begins, but that might not happen. And finally I'll finish it off with Six Degrees, which I'm mainly interested in because of the cast, and not J.J. Abrams attachment to it.

Finally we finish off the week on Friday with only one show that I've deemed worthwhile, but it's a fucking good one. The third season of Battlestar Galactica begins on Sci-Fi on October 6th, giving everyone plenty of time to pick up the DVDs from the first two seasons and catch up, if you haven't already been watching. I love the hell out of this show and whole heartedly recommend to anyone with a brain, but I've got another post saved up to gush about BSG.

Weekends suck for dramatic television. I have a feeling my weekends are going to be dedicated solely to sports. (even though I won't be watching the NFL anymore)

Of course, this is all fairly tentative. I imagine there will be at least one great show I'm completely overlooking at this point that I'll be super into halfway through the season. This is just a little exercise to get a TV junkie like myself hyped up for the upcoming season. Only a bit of 3 weeks until Prison Break kicks it off!

2 day old news: Arrested Development is kind of back!!!

This article basically explains everything. We can watch Arrested Development reruns either on MSN's video service (they had one?), HDNet (for you home theater enthusiasts), and G4 (another non gaming, girls, gadgets, 4th g related show they have added to their lineup).

At least this show will get more exposure. There is buzz about a movie, which Will Arnett commented on in a recent interview. It will never happen, but news like this helps keep the dream alive.

MyTube: NEVER USE THE BATHROOM IN JAPAN

I forget if I posted this. Looking back in the archives of the blog it doesn't look like it. What took me so long!? I saw this clip about 2 months ago now. I have no idea how I came across this clip seeing as how all the text is in Japanese and would be practically unsearchable on YouTube, but thank God I have found it.

Its a prank from one of the seemingly endless number of Japanese prank shows that exist in that country. I think the clip is pretty much self explanatory. I also appreciate the use of the Mission: Impossible theme song.

P.S. Keep an eye out at the end when they cut back to the studio, I think that's Beat Takeshi in a Little Sailor Boy Hitler outfit

ESPN NFL 2k5 vs. Madden: Biggest screw job in history?

I love football. I love video games. I also love "THEM TWINS!!!". Madden Football has been the industry standard as far as video game football goes. Unfortunately, Electronic Arts has basically chosen one aspect of the game to "tweak" every year and release basically the same game over and over because like suckers, we all still buy it. And boy have there been some competitors, NFL Fever, NFL Blitz, etc.

Things changed in 2004. Visual Concepts, a subsidiary of Sega, had been releasing multi-platform sports titles for the next gen systems aka The Ps2, the xbox, and the gamecube since Sega's Dreamcast was rudely awakened. The NFL 2k series had been getting better and better with each version. 2k5 was the perfect storm of sorts. VC smoothed out their football engine, widly improved their graphics, and included some groundbreaking integration of the ESPN license and put out ESPN NFL 2k5 for 20 bucks to stick it to Madden. The game was as close to perfect as you can get. It had its issues in the internet arena, and the lack of a proper qb spy function really hurt play, but it was just the best damn game on the market.

In response, EA bought the exclusive rights to the NFL, signed a new 15 year deal with ESPN, and basically killed the 2k series so they could continue to release mediocre Madden games. Anyway, we are getting close to the release of Madden 2007 for the Xbox 360 and while it looks good, it still seems to be the same old Madden. To make myself feel better, I spent a couple hours painstakingly updating as much of the NFL roster as I could, and creating the pertinent rookies. I have been replaying NFL 2k5 and you know what, the game is still the best damn football game out there. The running game is umpteen times better than Madden's (even this ridiculous idea of controlling your lead blocker probably wont solve its horrible collision issues, and poor between the tackles animation), the passing game was very refined and required a working knowledge of the play (vs. audibling everything into some sort of deep bomb and tossing passes to your best reciever in Madden), the right stick juke moves were amazingly deep allowing you to combo spins, stutter steps, jukes into highlight reels (which Madden has now totally ripped off), and finally the presentation of your own personal highlights at halftime and at the end of the game commentated by Chris Berman is still one of the funnest things to watch (Madden still hasn't done this, but apparently believes that recording Peyton Manning's actual voice yelling out numbers and words will help players feel more "in the game").

It really is sad that the NFL 2k series was not allowed to continue because it was clearly on a path of assasination akin to Conan's quest to lop off the head of Thulsa Doom (By Crom!!!).

NFL 2k5 can be picked up for less than 20 dollars anywhere. Get it for the Xbox (the hard drive is what allows the game to replay your highlights to you during halftime), you won't regret it.

Personal Confuser + Tivo + Internet = Access to MTV's "The Hills" ANYWHERE!!!

So, I am no computer geek. I appreciate my PC for allowing me to get on the "triple dub" and view movie news/rumors, sports news, waste time, and chat on AIM. Beyond that, I have no clue how to program anything, what java is or does, and if it wasn't for Blogger's ridiculously easy setup you would not be reading this right now.

Anyway, I thought I would post how 1337 (elite) I am after viewing the newest episode of "The Real World" on my laptop...as it was streamed off my Tivo about 90 miles away.

Basically, you need a Tivo, a PC, and a home network with access to the internet. First, download "Tivo Desktop" from www.tivo.com Then download Orb from www.tivoanywhere.com Those two programs will allow you to get your tivo programs onto your PC and then streamed across the internet. It works surprisingly well. It is a bit annoying when you try to fast forward through commercials though because you view everything through windows media player and it has to rebuffer and you are just guessing when you think the commercials will be over. All in all, it easily accomplishes what you want. You have access to your Tivo's library anywhere that has internet access.

For our geekeir readers out there, this I am sure is nothing new to you. But screw you. For all the non-dungeon masters out there, I highly recommend Orb's product and you know I loves me the Tivo long time.

You Can Almost Smell the Vice

Nothing too profound to say here. Just an attempt to yell to the dozen people reading this to check out MIAMI VICE this weekend. I haven't seen it yet and I certainly can't promise it's the best movie so far this year but all indications suggest that it's at least one of the more unique films of the year. Hollywood just isn't in the business of turning out realistic crime dramas so pictures like this don't come along often.

Oh, and if you're still operating under the belief that this is just a rehash of the series then put your nickels and dimes together and buy a clue.

Russell + Tarantino = Me Happy

The big news just keeps coming from Comic-Con. It has been reported that 12 men were spotted on the convention floor with brushed teeth, I repeat 12 men brushed their teeth. While details aren't quite clear on that scoop another big story comes from Comingsoon.net. While hyping his joint film with Robert Rodriguez, GRIND HOUSE, Quentin Tarantino announced that living legend Kurt Russell will have the lead in his half of the movie titled "Death Proof."

Russell will play a slasher character known as Stuntman Mike, a role that had originally been cast with Mickey Rourke. No definite word has come out as to why Rourke is off the film but if I know Rourke (which I don't) I bet it has something to do with manslaughter.

This could be a real shot in the arm for Russell who needs it after POSEIDON bombed its way in and out of theaters in record time earlier this summer. He has played a ton of anti-heroes in his career but he has really never done a total maniac turn that this role promises to be. I sort of feel bad for Rourke but to be honest he has been on an upswing the past few years and has roles in some high profile upcoming flicks, including the Tarantino-produced KILLSHOT. GRIND HOUSE is scheduled for release on April 6th.

What a difference a few hours can make. Earlier today I was bummed to see that Russell might end up doing needless STARGATE sequels. Now I'm stoked to see that he'll be working with my favorite director. Of course I'm still wearing the same syrup-stained T-shirt that I've had on all day so it's not like things are all that different.

More Stargate! Why?

In San Diego this weekend hundreds and thousands of men have fled their mom's basement to attend the nation's biggest comic book convention. You won't find me there, mainly because my mom's basement is sweet. She just bought me a mini-fridge and everything. So instead of trading back issues of "She-Hulk" with some guy dressed as Wesley Crusher I sit on the sidelines to hear all the news to come from this nerd gathering.

One such item comes straight from the mouth of Dean Devlin, who along with director Roland Emmerich helped bring such films as INDEPENDENCE DAY and UNIVERSAL SOLDIER (AKA: Perfection!). Another one of their flicks, STARGATE, has somehow spawned a true following and led to 2 television shows that I've never watched. While at Comic-Con Devlin revealed that a second and possibly 3rd STARGATE film is in the works at MGM (now owned by Sony). "They think there is an audience out there who would like to see what part two and part three were intended to be because there was a larger story arc that we had in mind," said Devlin.

Honestly, where are the rabid STARGATE fans? They must exist but for the life of me I don't know why anyone would watch that below average film more than once, not to mention a TV show that appears to have the same budget that "She's the Sheriff" had 20 years ago. As a big Kurt Russell fan I'd hate to see this be a role he reprises. He's often said that sequels don't appeal to him and aside from ESCAPE FROM L.A. his track record backs that belief up. Instead of another STARGATE why can't we have a CAPTAIN RON RETURNS? Or MIRACLE 2: RUSSIA'S REVENGE? Or the most obvious of all, TANGO & CASH VACATION TOGETHER AT MARTHA'S VINEYARD?

Balancing act

You know amidst all the Don John mania that has infected this blog, I was starting to feel that we weren't representing the fairer sex. So, here is a photo of super hottie Marissa Miller.

YOWZA!!!

CGI Heroes in a Half Shell?

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. If you are in my age demographic, you were probably obsessed with them either in cartoon, toy, or movie form. Over the past 2 years there has been wild speculation over a new CGI film coming out. At one time John Woo's name was attached to the program. Thankfully, that was debunked and Woo has moved onto better projects like He-man (which I think he is also done with), an old timey railroad movie involving Chinamen and Chow Yun Fat, a musical, and now a new project back in Hong Kong...at least we will always have the "Hard" series of movies (Hard Boiled, Hard Target)

Anyway, someone was crazy enough to actually make a CGI Turtles movie! Apparently its set sometime after the movie sequel (but will acknowledge the cartoon series somehow), and thankfully denies any knowledge of a certain group of amphibians traveling through time. And guess what!? The CGI looks kind of good!

TEASER

MyTube: Nobody's Watching

Well, it finally happened. YouTube changes the course of network TV. Long story short, a pilot that was making the rounds at last year's "upfronts" (where networks look at pilots and decide whether a show is worth investing in) got onto YouTube, got some good buzz, and is now being put into production by NBC.

The show is called "Nobody's Watching". Bill Lawrence, the mastermind behind Scrubs and Boy Meets World, is one of the co-writers of the show. The concept is pretty fantastic. 2 life long sitcom fans are hired by the WB to write a sitcom, and while writing it they will live on a television set with a live audience watching as they try and write a sitcom. Unfortunately, I hate the 2 leads. I also wish that the show actually talked a little bit more about sitcoms. There are only 2-3 jokes about sitcoms themselves and their cliches. Although, one of the strongest points is Alan Thicke's appearance. Also, I love the network execs. They are great characters.

Either way, its a pretty fantastic precedent being set here. You can read the article in Variety explaining more about this whole thing.

Here is part 1 of the pilot. Links to part 2 and 3 will conveniently show themselves when done with part 1.

Vice Refresher

This is probably a bad sign. For the second entry in a row the accompanied photo has featured Don Johnson. This must break some type of blog rule and I'm sure we'll now be the laughing stock of the blogging community. I apologize for the trouble this may cause and I promise to do my best to make sure the next item I submit in no way features Don Johnson. Even if CBS announces a "Nash Bridges" retrospective is in the works I will resist the urge to use a photo of Johnson mugging it up with Cheech.

Now why would I use a photo of Johnson alongside the unemployable Philip Michael Thomas? Well NBC has decided to air the pilot episode of "Miami Vice" this Saturday at 8. Obviously this is in anticipation of the big screen VICE movie opening July 28th starring Colin Farrell and Jamie Foxx. Farrell and Foxx will host the broadcast and since the 2 hour pilot is being stretched to 3 you can bet there will be a lot of footage of the new film throughout the evening. Probably not worth cancelling Saturday night activities such as dining, dancing, and fucking but if you're as hyped for the movie as I am this could be a great way to sample the old before embracing the new.