Arrested Development: A Eulogy.
Wow..I just finished the 2 hour (series?) finale for Arrested Development, and it has lived up to the masterful consistency the show has given us for 2 and 3/8ths seasons. They pulled no punches, and in the sad event that this show doesn't come back, we do have some closure. Things come together in ways that you would never have imagined, and only make you wonder what greatness could have been had this been allowed to have a full run. The funniest show OF ALL TIME, hands down, possibly came to an end tonight, and I hope all of you reading either got to enjoy it along with me, or will do so when the opportunity becomes available. Let's all do what we can to ensure this show finds a home somewhere else and is given the chance and backing that it deserves.
Justin Fixes the Movies Vol. 3: Saw II
This one is going to be slightly different because I have no reservations recommending this movie. This is not to say it is perfect or even great, but more worked than did not. Here goes:
-MTV Editing needs to die. Quick cuts aren't necessary to increase tension. One scene in particular involving a pit goes to show this beautifully..one of the best torture scenes I have ever seen.
-Writing yourself in a hole that can only be explained by a twist..M Night sort of started this revolution, but it has become something of a crutch. Even if the twist is pretty good (at least one part of it) as is the case here, it's kind of overplayed and you knew at least some kind of twist was coming, thus diminishing the power that could have been.
-Everyone that has been involved with 7th Heaven (except Belzer) should not be allowed to do anything else ever.
-WE have on our hands the most interesting franchise serial "killer" to be seen in a while. We also have two movies that have shown a lot of potential, but have come up short of being classic.
-Let the blood flow. This ties into quick cuts, but I know I yearn for more organic effects. I know the MPAA is probably responsible for this, but if that is the case, don't hold out on the UNCUT version for the next sequel. KNB, I know you weren't directly involved here, but allow me to rant a little on you. Let's get back to the Savini roots.
-Make the characters more than an excuse for a brutal death scene. Two of the three females in the house have slim to no backstory. We are even left to wonder what becomes of one of them after she is shown trapped..but never resolved. This is just plain sloppy. As for the rest, the only one we really have any feeling for at all is the recurring character from the first film. And for christ's sake, low budget is not an excuse for poor acting, and all of the houseguests are pretty shite in this department.
-Thumbs up for tying in the first film in such a strong fashion, and yet make it so that you don't need to have seen the first film to understand what happened here.
-Inventive death scenes are great, and the movtivation for the murders are interesting to say the least..but again, the script shouldn't revolve around them, but the other way around.
-It is hard to follow up such an odd film, but it didn't have to be this conventional. For what it is though, this is at the top of the game.
My final verdict: Saw II is great for fans of the first, and fans of non shitty horror movies in general. Perhaps a bit conventional for the Peter Jackson die hardies, and a bit off the wall for the Kevin Williamsons, this should entertain anyone in between.
Tune in next week when I fix Nic Cage in "The Weather Man."
-MTV Editing needs to die. Quick cuts aren't necessary to increase tension. One scene in particular involving a pit goes to show this beautifully..one of the best torture scenes I have ever seen.
-Writing yourself in a hole that can only be explained by a twist..M Night sort of started this revolution, but it has become something of a crutch. Even if the twist is pretty good (at least one part of it) as is the case here, it's kind of overplayed and you knew at least some kind of twist was coming, thus diminishing the power that could have been.
-Everyone that has been involved with 7th Heaven (except Belzer) should not be allowed to do anything else ever.
-WE have on our hands the most interesting franchise serial "killer" to be seen in a while. We also have two movies that have shown a lot of potential, but have come up short of being classic.
-Let the blood flow. This ties into quick cuts, but I know I yearn for more organic effects. I know the MPAA is probably responsible for this, but if that is the case, don't hold out on the UNCUT version for the next sequel. KNB, I know you weren't directly involved here, but allow me to rant a little on you. Let's get back to the Savini roots.
-Make the characters more than an excuse for a brutal death scene. Two of the three females in the house have slim to no backstory. We are even left to wonder what becomes of one of them after she is shown trapped..but never resolved. This is just plain sloppy. As for the rest, the only one we really have any feeling for at all is the recurring character from the first film. And for christ's sake, low budget is not an excuse for poor acting, and all of the houseguests are pretty shite in this department.
-Thumbs up for tying in the first film in such a strong fashion, and yet make it so that you don't need to have seen the first film to understand what happened here.
-Inventive death scenes are great, and the movtivation for the murders are interesting to say the least..but again, the script shouldn't revolve around them, but the other way around.
-It is hard to follow up such an odd film, but it didn't have to be this conventional. For what it is though, this is at the top of the game.
My final verdict: Saw II is great for fans of the first, and fans of non shitty horror movies in general. Perhaps a bit conventional for the Peter Jackson die hardies, and a bit off the wall for the Kevin Williamsons, this should entertain anyone in between.
Tune in next week when I fix Nic Cage in "The Weather Man."
Fazer on Film...this week's installment: PREDATOR
Approximately 6 perfect movies exist, this is one of them.
'nuff said.
Oh, I got a new mic also, so "stick around"
'nuff said.
Oh, I got a new mic also, so "stick around"
Review: Waiting (Justin Fixes the Movies vol 2)
I have never worked in a resturaunt, but I must say I laughed quite a few times at this movie. Don't get me wrong, this is no Office Space (which it has been criminally compared to) or even Van Wilder, but a potentially great movie with quite a bit of excess baggage, and a bit too much reliance on running gags.
How to Save it?
- Cut some characters. Milonakis and that other guy were completely unecessary..as were many more that I have forgotten were in the movie. All they served was a distraction from the main story..if there is one..and kept the more interesting characters from developing.
- What's your fuckin point? Was this Justin Long's story? Was it the Freaks and Geeks guy's story? Was it Ryan Reynolds' excuse to deliver one liners? It's actually a sloppy mix of the three, but not enough time is spent on any one for them to really do any good. Anna Faris, who actually has some comedic chops, was completely wasted here, as were the other chicks, except the overused "crazy bitch" waitress, who incidentally came across as the only over the top character on display.
- Slacker comedy doesn't have to be sloppy. In the right hands, this could have been office space, but the script's unevenness and the goddamn showing of the balls running gag stamp all over that.
- Ryan Reynolds..fire your agent. You are a funny person, and can make unfunny lines memorable..but you are wasted and one dimensional here. How bout the best actor with worst movies award here?
- Justin Long's arc was guessable from the beginning. Yawn.
- As more proof that Dane Cook and Ryan Reynolds are the same person, both are in this movie, but never appear together.
- Development..outside of Justin Long's yawnfest and a very short glimpse into Ryan Reynold's character's home life, we never see any motivation for these folks or why they behave in the way that we do. I rarely say this, but another half hour could have been tacked to this movie and made it far superior, if used properly.
Overall, I recommend that you do check this one out, and it is superior to most of the shit that passes for comedy these days, but in my elitist eyes, this is another case of potential greatness and a dropped ball.
How to Save it?
- Cut some characters. Milonakis and that other guy were completely unecessary..as were many more that I have forgotten were in the movie. All they served was a distraction from the main story..if there is one..and kept the more interesting characters from developing.
- What's your fuckin point? Was this Justin Long's story? Was it the Freaks and Geeks guy's story? Was it Ryan Reynolds' excuse to deliver one liners? It's actually a sloppy mix of the three, but not enough time is spent on any one for them to really do any good. Anna Faris, who actually has some comedic chops, was completely wasted here, as were the other chicks, except the overused "crazy bitch" waitress, who incidentally came across as the only over the top character on display.
- Slacker comedy doesn't have to be sloppy. In the right hands, this could have been office space, but the script's unevenness and the goddamn showing of the balls running gag stamp all over that.
- Ryan Reynolds..fire your agent. You are a funny person, and can make unfunny lines memorable..but you are wasted and one dimensional here. How bout the best actor with worst movies award here?
- Justin Long's arc was guessable from the beginning. Yawn.
- As more proof that Dane Cook and Ryan Reynolds are the same person, both are in this movie, but never appear together.
- Development..outside of Justin Long's yawnfest and a very short glimpse into Ryan Reynold's character's home life, we never see any motivation for these folks or why they behave in the way that we do. I rarely say this, but another half hour could have been tacked to this movie and made it far superior, if used properly.
Overall, I recommend that you do check this one out, and it is superior to most of the shit that passes for comedy these days, but in my elitist eyes, this is another case of potential greatness and a dropped ball.
Review: Doom (Justin Fixes the Movies volume 1)
This is a little test if you will, a foray into reviewing shit. When it comes to DVDs, I will try to judge the movie on it's own merits, and not give much time to audio or video quality, or extras, unless they are such an overwhelming factor that it would influence the shelf life of the dvd. Why? Countless other sites cover this stuff, and I figure if you are here, you probably want to see me rant on the movie itself. I will assume that you have read other reviews, and have a general idea of what the movie is about. Our first victim, Doom.
Growing up, Doom was a revolution to me. Sure it wasn't the first FPS that I played (that was Zero Tolerance) nor were there any Nazis to slaughter, but something about this game worked. It looked beautiful at the time, and was pretty gruesome. I would say a lot of the reason Grand Theft Auto works so well is a direct influence from Doom..but thats too abstract for me to attempt to describe right now, since it's so late. Anyways..what was I saying?
Oh yeah. Doom never really had a great story, but it was pretty fun to play. It was at this point last year when I found out it was being made into a movie that I realized that Hollywood had hit rock bottom. Don't cringe, that was unintentional.
This movie is absolute shit. It actually takes the almost non existant story of the Doom franchise and tries to merge it with the Resident Evil movie, making for a retarded mess. It is boring to watch, poorly acted, and has some one liners later on in the movie that rival Batman and Robin. The one scene that everyone talks about, the "first person" scene, looks better in the game...as do most of the CGI effects present.
Shew..ok. Now Deeper: There actually was a criminally fumbled plotline here, as the Rock's Sarge character had potential to be interesting if it didn't end up so predictable.
How could this movie be saved you ask? Here goes.. (SPOILER WARNING)
- Lose the genetic experiment shit. This was a portal to hell and should have stayed that way. Not only is it a bit less played out, it won't unnecessarily convolute the plot.
- Less concentration on action (which doesn't even get started until about the halfway mark anyway) and more on the horror, hopelessness, and fear elements..which are practically nonexistant.
- Greatly expand Sarge's Arc, and for the love of god, don't dumb it down to him vs the hero in the end. Show this guy gradually lose it throughout the film.
- Lose the sister. Bad character, worse actress.
- Link it more to the game. Naming characters after ID software staff is not enough. This had the potential to be a desolate, hopeless schooling of cinema..but with all that said, I guess people weren't expecting much from a videogame movie. Thank you Dr. Boll.
Growing up, Doom was a revolution to me. Sure it wasn't the first FPS that I played (that was Zero Tolerance) nor were there any Nazis to slaughter, but something about this game worked. It looked beautiful at the time, and was pretty gruesome. I would say a lot of the reason Grand Theft Auto works so well is a direct influence from Doom..but thats too abstract for me to attempt to describe right now, since it's so late. Anyways..what was I saying?
Oh yeah. Doom never really had a great story, but it was pretty fun to play. It was at this point last year when I found out it was being made into a movie that I realized that Hollywood had hit rock bottom. Don't cringe, that was unintentional.
This movie is absolute shit. It actually takes the almost non existant story of the Doom franchise and tries to merge it with the Resident Evil movie, making for a retarded mess. It is boring to watch, poorly acted, and has some one liners later on in the movie that rival Batman and Robin. The one scene that everyone talks about, the "first person" scene, looks better in the game...as do most of the CGI effects present.
Shew..ok. Now Deeper: There actually was a criminally fumbled plotline here, as the Rock's Sarge character had potential to be interesting if it didn't end up so predictable.
How could this movie be saved you ask? Here goes.. (SPOILER WARNING)
- Lose the genetic experiment shit. This was a portal to hell and should have stayed that way. Not only is it a bit less played out, it won't unnecessarily convolute the plot.
- Less concentration on action (which doesn't even get started until about the halfway mark anyway) and more on the horror, hopelessness, and fear elements..which are practically nonexistant.
- Greatly expand Sarge's Arc, and for the love of god, don't dumb it down to him vs the hero in the end. Show this guy gradually lose it throughout the film.
- Lose the sister. Bad character, worse actress.
- Link it more to the game. Naming characters after ID software staff is not enough. This had the potential to be a desolate, hopeless schooling of cinema..but with all that said, I guess people weren't expecting much from a videogame movie. Thank you Dr. Boll.
Supernatural to Thursday...
..and thank god for it. Starting this March, Supernatural will occupy the slot following Smallville..and perhaps I should start catching up.
Hat Tip to The Futon Critic.
Hat Tip to The Futon Critic.
New year, new mic
Hope you guys all enjoyed the new show. I thought it was pretty fantastic, except for the fact that my 15 dollar mic is clearly not cutting it anymore. I will hopefully have a better one by next episode.
Stick with us, big things are happening.
Stick with us, big things are happening.
2006 Episode 1: No Time for Love, Dr. Jones
Christian Jones is the saint responsible for this rebirth. Enjoy the first podcast of 2006 available here. Subscribers, check your queue. Non subscribers, subscribe. Thank you again to Christian Jones at http://www.aleph0.com and our new home, No Rights Reserved here.
Happy new year and enjoy the episode. Plenty more, along with the new site, to come very shortly.
Happy new year and enjoy the episode. Plenty more, along with the new site, to come very shortly.
Guess What...
The first podcast of the year will be in your hands within a few hours. Thats right, we went behind your back, just when you were expecting us to rest until the new site/venture is finished, and recorded what I am calling 2006 Episode 1: Reborn. It's completely unedited and without boundaries, and I think our best work yet. Clocking in at over an hour, we had quite a bit to talk about. I hope you enjoy the listen, and check your subscription soon, probably by the end of tomorrow if not tonight.
It's A Dancing Frog--With A Really Big Eye
So I haven't posted in a while--work, as well as limited internet access, hamper such things--but the news that UPN and WB are merging to form The CW (standing for CBS-Warner, as media giant Viacom owns both UPN and CBS) is too big to go unnoted.
I think this is a smart move for both networks. Neither network has a full, seven-day, prime-time schedule. Many of the programs that "made" the WB are now gone or leaving (I'm thinking of Dawson's Creek, Buffy and Angel, and Seventh Heaven), and the ones that have replaced them (Gilmore, Everwood, One Tree Hill, Smallville) bring in big ratings but uneven quality. UPN's schedule has been, by and large, a black hole for years--but they've still got the best show on tv right now, 'Veronica Mars,'(1) and one of the funniest, 'Everybody Hates Chris.'(2) Aside from that, are you watching 'South Beach?' Or 'Cuts?'
Luckily for fans of 'Mars' and 'Chris,' both those shows are successful enough that they'll find a slot on the new network. CBS honcho Les Moonves (a guy I'm very conflicted about--he backed 'ER' and 'Friends,' but also 'CSI' and now eschews long-form storytelling. And then there are his ideas about how to get people to watch the network news again--by making it less info and more tainment.) mentioned 'Veronica' by name in the press conference, saying he'd like to do a night of 'Gilmore' and then 'Veronica,' which could work out really well. (Although I do wonder how the sweet and sincere tone of 'Gilmore' would lead into the "let's call our child abuse episode 'Nobody Puts Baby In A Corner'!" insanity of 'Veronica Mars."
The new network means more publicity on CBS and elsewhere, which means that shows like "Chris" and "Mars" truly have a chance to compete on the network level. On the other hand, competing on that level is going to raise expectations, which could lead to cancellation.
And shows like those don't deserve to go the way of Freaks and Geeks.
1. New episodes start tonight. You better watch. Or I will find you.
2. I watch 'Arrested Development' on DVD, so the funniest show on tv right now for my money has to be 'Scrubs.' I'm still trying to decide what was funnier last night: the gospel rendition of "Payback's a bitch," or the very-meta end, with Lawyer Ted's acapella band doing the folk-ukelalie version of 'Over The Rainbow.'
I think this is a smart move for both networks. Neither network has a full, seven-day, prime-time schedule. Many of the programs that "made" the WB are now gone or leaving (I'm thinking of Dawson's Creek, Buffy and Angel, and Seventh Heaven), and the ones that have replaced them (Gilmore, Everwood, One Tree Hill, Smallville) bring in big ratings but uneven quality. UPN's schedule has been, by and large, a black hole for years--but they've still got the best show on tv right now, 'Veronica Mars,'(1) and one of the funniest, 'Everybody Hates Chris.'(2) Aside from that, are you watching 'South Beach?' Or 'Cuts?'
Luckily for fans of 'Mars' and 'Chris,' both those shows are successful enough that they'll find a slot on the new network. CBS honcho Les Moonves (a guy I'm very conflicted about--he backed 'ER' and 'Friends,' but also 'CSI' and now eschews long-form storytelling. And then there are his ideas about how to get people to watch the network news again--by making it less info and more tainment.) mentioned 'Veronica' by name in the press conference, saying he'd like to do a night of 'Gilmore' and then 'Veronica,' which could work out really well. (Although I do wonder how the sweet and sincere tone of 'Gilmore' would lead into the "let's call our child abuse episode 'Nobody Puts Baby In A Corner'!" insanity of 'Veronica Mars."
The new network means more publicity on CBS and elsewhere, which means that shows like "Chris" and "Mars" truly have a chance to compete on the network level. On the other hand, competing on that level is going to raise expectations, which could lead to cancellation.
And shows like those don't deserve to go the way of Freaks and Geeks.
1. New episodes start tonight. You better watch. Or I will find you.
2. I watch 'Arrested Development' on DVD, so the funniest show on tv right now for my money has to be 'Scrubs.' I'm still trying to decide what was funnier last night: the gospel rendition of "Payback's a bitch," or the very-meta end, with Lawyer Ted's acapella band doing the folk-ukelalie version of 'Over The Rainbow.'
So Close..
The promised land is just a heartbeat away. It's time to beef up the staff, and I need your help.
-we are looking for a fourth person to join the podcast..email if interested. This is a pretty tough spot, and there are quite a few guidelines here to be considered.
-I am looking for people to host other shows..email if interested with ideas. This may be a good idea for people looking to contribute but aren't able to commit to Stealing Cable.
-we are looking for more writers to hold up the blog end. The least commitment, I just want someone to pop in and post about things relevant to what we cover.
we will be doing a few more shows here..I want to have this new thing perfect before it goes live. If you can think of any ways to get involved and would like to, do not hesitate to email.
Finally, I was cleaning some old files off of my computer and I found the partial file of the never before heard "2005 roundup show." For those of you still wondering where it was, a technical glitch caused me to lose the full 40 minute recording. What I have found appears to be the first 10 or so minutes. I will post it when I get some time to go over it.
When we move to the new place, all files will be hosted here..that means you will have the show the second I am done editing it. No offense at all to Joe Lavers at the Average Joes, without him, none of this would be possible. There is a place for him if he chooses it at the new place. We will be switching to new programs to both connect and record the show, hopefully eliminating some of the technical issues and allowing for more interactive content. Stealing Cable, along with some other surprises I have lined up, will cover a much broader realm of content than the entity that you know now. My best hints? If you don't already, subscribe via the feedburner link, because it is going to be the only thing that stays the same, and the only way to get content the second it is delivered.
Now that I'm done hyping this, let's hope everything goes smooth. You can look for the beginning of the end of our current format with the first SC of 06 next week, if we can dig Canadian Jake out of the tundra.
-we are looking for a fourth person to join the podcast..email if interested. This is a pretty tough spot, and there are quite a few guidelines here to be considered.
-I am looking for people to host other shows..email if interested with ideas. This may be a good idea for people looking to contribute but aren't able to commit to Stealing Cable.
-we are looking for more writers to hold up the blog end. The least commitment, I just want someone to pop in and post about things relevant to what we cover.
we will be doing a few more shows here..I want to have this new thing perfect before it goes live. If you can think of any ways to get involved and would like to, do not hesitate to email.
Finally, I was cleaning some old files off of my computer and I found the partial file of the never before heard "2005 roundup show." For those of you still wondering where it was, a technical glitch caused me to lose the full 40 minute recording. What I have found appears to be the first 10 or so minutes. I will post it when I get some time to go over it.
When we move to the new place, all files will be hosted here..that means you will have the show the second I am done editing it. No offense at all to Joe Lavers at the Average Joes, without him, none of this would be possible. There is a place for him if he chooses it at the new place. We will be switching to new programs to both connect and record the show, hopefully eliminating some of the technical issues and allowing for more interactive content. Stealing Cable, along with some other surprises I have lined up, will cover a much broader realm of content than the entity that you know now. My best hints? If you don't already, subscribe via the feedburner link, because it is going to be the only thing that stays the same, and the only way to get content the second it is delivered.
Now that I'm done hyping this, let's hope everything goes smooth. You can look for the beginning of the end of our current format with the first SC of 06 next week, if we can dig Canadian Jake out of the tundra.
Calling all cars
We're making our move soon.. I will be in contact with those of you that have contacted me. Anyone else that is interested in movies/games/other forms of entertainment and has any writing experience, or even better, internet writing experience, and would like to be a part of this, shoot me an email.
We will be back soon.
We will be back soon.
2005: The Best of (Justin)
Hello folks.
Before I get into this, rumors of the end of this project and the podcast it supports demise are based in reality. Over the last few weeks I have considered whether or not this is really worth it. While it's no longer that dire, my mind is not completely made up as to whether or not we'll continue on into the new year. This could be a symptom of winter tv withdrawl, the lack of new Howard shows for inspirado, or the year end wrap up show that we did, and was great, but was unsalvagable from a tech error. Keep checking back, because I'll always be posting here even if the podcast goes the way of good shows on fox.
2005: The 10 best TV shows
To do this fairly, I am only counting shows that have started a season run in 05, not completed one. For example Veronica Mars season 1 would walk away on top, but it started in 04. Get what I mean? On to the shows:
10. 24 Season 5
09. Everybody Hates Chris Season 1
08. 30 Days Season 1
07. Curb Your Enthusiasm Season 5
06. Prison Break Season 1
05. Family Guy Season 3
04. Eyes - The first few episodes
03. Rescue Me Season 2
02. Arrested Development Season 3
01. Nip/Tuck Season 3
Color me crazy; even after the lackluster reveal of the focus of the entire season, Nip/Tuck continues on a path to be one of the great show of all time. Arrested Development, having already cemented it's spot, get's it's (maybe not??) swan song in the number 2 spot, but that isn't really fair considering I had to lump all genres into one list. Rescue Me improves upon it's first season even with the slightly rushed finale. The best flash in the pan show, Eyes, would still be around if it weren't for Housewives and Islands. Family Guy comes back from the dead and gives life to DVD as a new medium for first run TV. Prison Break remains great even though it spread itself pretty thin, Curb returns with an effort usurped only by the wonderous third season, the only reality show endorsed by SC kicks ass, the best new comedy of the season is based around a stand up act, and Jack Bauer(almost) returns to form after a hate it or hate it more season 3.
Biggest Busts: FX does Comedy, Lost gets Cloned
Music:
I had to dig a lot harder this time, because I just didn't buy into that much new music this year.
10. Foo Fighters - In your Honor
09. Beck - Guero
08. Kanye West - Late Registration
07. Nada Surf - Weight is a Gift
06. Common - Be
05. Dredg - Catch without Arms
04. Open Hand - You and Me
03. Dangerdoom - The Mouse and the Mask
02. Turbonegro - Party Animals
01. Queens of the Stone Age - Lullabies to Paralyze
Queens reign supreme, the best concert in the game hits number 2, a recipe for disaster with adult swim liscensing turns out to be amazing at 3, coming from nowhere on a shitty hardcore record label gives us a whole new spin on guitar rock at 4, 5 brings us a band that upon first listen sounds like everything on your radio, but is much deeper than that, 6 brings a return to form with the best jazz rap record of all time, Nada Surf goes way beyond their one hit from 10 years ago with their latest effort, Kanye doesn't quite match the College Dropout, but provides one of the best hip hop cds of the year, Beck releases one of his experimental cds to moderate success, and the Foos come back after the awful 1x1 with this bloated in a good way set.
Biggest Busts: Kanye - while I love the cd, I couldn't help but feel disappointed after listening because his previous record actually came in and changed the hip hop world.
Movies:
I probably didn't see 10 movies from this year. Let's find out:
10.
09.
08.
07.
06.
05. Serenity
04. Sin City
03. The 40 Year Old Virgin
02. The Devil's Rejects
01. Batman Begins
Guess that answers your question. Truth be told, I did watch more than that from this year, but most were so mediocre that I plum forgot. Joss gives us a good movie that tanked, Rob R. gives us your next great franchise, Judd Apatow gives us our next great comedic talents, Rob Zombie kicks your ass, and Christian Bale is the best bat ever.
Busts: Cinema in general
Video Games:
I sure did play a whole lot, but I think most of that was a certain ditty from last year. Here's a top five anyway:
5. Lumines - PSP
4. Call of Duty 2 - 360
3. Perfect Dark Zero - 360
2. We Love Katamari - Ps2
1. Mario Kart DS
A classic at 1, roll shit up in balls at 2, 3 and 4 were a toss up but online play in PDZ gives it the edge, and rounded up by a little innovative puzzler, and still the best PSP game i have played (yes i have not played GTA for some reason).
Biggest Bust: Halo 2's new maps: Yes i still play hours and hours on end, but the new maps lack what made the first bunch so special. Specifically what that is, I can't tell you, but I do know i'd play on Headlong and Zanzibar before Relic and Containment any day. The train level was pretty cool though.
Website of the year:
YTMND.com - I am addicted to this site. I could try to explain it, but just do yourself a favor and check it out yourself.
Before I get into this, rumors of the end of this project and the podcast it supports demise are based in reality. Over the last few weeks I have considered whether or not this is really worth it. While it's no longer that dire, my mind is not completely made up as to whether or not we'll continue on into the new year. This could be a symptom of winter tv withdrawl, the lack of new Howard shows for inspirado, or the year end wrap up show that we did, and was great, but was unsalvagable from a tech error. Keep checking back, because I'll always be posting here even if the podcast goes the way of good shows on fox.
2005: The 10 best TV shows
To do this fairly, I am only counting shows that have started a season run in 05, not completed one. For example Veronica Mars season 1 would walk away on top, but it started in 04. Get what I mean? On to the shows:
10. 24 Season 5
09. Everybody Hates Chris Season 1
08. 30 Days Season 1
07. Curb Your Enthusiasm Season 5
06. Prison Break Season 1
05. Family Guy Season 3
04. Eyes - The first few episodes
03. Rescue Me Season 2
02. Arrested Development Season 3
01. Nip/Tuck Season 3
Color me crazy; even after the lackluster reveal of the focus of the entire season, Nip/Tuck continues on a path to be one of the great show of all time. Arrested Development, having already cemented it's spot, get's it's (maybe not??) swan song in the number 2 spot, but that isn't really fair considering I had to lump all genres into one list. Rescue Me improves upon it's first season even with the slightly rushed finale. The best flash in the pan show, Eyes, would still be around if it weren't for Housewives and Islands. Family Guy comes back from the dead and gives life to DVD as a new medium for first run TV. Prison Break remains great even though it spread itself pretty thin, Curb returns with an effort usurped only by the wonderous third season, the only reality show endorsed by SC kicks ass, the best new comedy of the season is based around a stand up act, and Jack Bauer(almost) returns to form after a hate it or hate it more season 3.
Biggest Busts: FX does Comedy, Lost gets Cloned
Music:
I had to dig a lot harder this time, because I just didn't buy into that much new music this year.
10. Foo Fighters - In your Honor
09. Beck - Guero
08. Kanye West - Late Registration
07. Nada Surf - Weight is a Gift
06. Common - Be
05. Dredg - Catch without Arms
04. Open Hand - You and Me
03. Dangerdoom - The Mouse and the Mask
02. Turbonegro - Party Animals
01. Queens of the Stone Age - Lullabies to Paralyze
Queens reign supreme, the best concert in the game hits number 2, a recipe for disaster with adult swim liscensing turns out to be amazing at 3, coming from nowhere on a shitty hardcore record label gives us a whole new spin on guitar rock at 4, 5 brings us a band that upon first listen sounds like everything on your radio, but is much deeper than that, 6 brings a return to form with the best jazz rap record of all time, Nada Surf goes way beyond their one hit from 10 years ago with their latest effort, Kanye doesn't quite match the College Dropout, but provides one of the best hip hop cds of the year, Beck releases one of his experimental cds to moderate success, and the Foos come back after the awful 1x1 with this bloated in a good way set.
Biggest Busts: Kanye - while I love the cd, I couldn't help but feel disappointed after listening because his previous record actually came in and changed the hip hop world.
Movies:
I probably didn't see 10 movies from this year. Let's find out:
10.
09.
08.
07.
06.
05. Serenity
04. Sin City
03. The 40 Year Old Virgin
02. The Devil's Rejects
01. Batman Begins
Guess that answers your question. Truth be told, I did watch more than that from this year, but most were so mediocre that I plum forgot. Joss gives us a good movie that tanked, Rob R. gives us your next great franchise, Judd Apatow gives us our next great comedic talents, Rob Zombie kicks your ass, and Christian Bale is the best bat ever.
Busts: Cinema in general
Video Games:
I sure did play a whole lot, but I think most of that was a certain ditty from last year. Here's a top five anyway:
5. Lumines - PSP
4. Call of Duty 2 - 360
3. Perfect Dark Zero - 360
2. We Love Katamari - Ps2
1. Mario Kart DS
A classic at 1, roll shit up in balls at 2, 3 and 4 were a toss up but online play in PDZ gives it the edge, and rounded up by a little innovative puzzler, and still the best PSP game i have played (yes i have not played GTA for some reason).
Biggest Bust: Halo 2's new maps: Yes i still play hours and hours on end, but the new maps lack what made the first bunch so special. Specifically what that is, I can't tell you, but I do know i'd play on Headlong and Zanzibar before Relic and Containment any day. The train level was pretty cool though.
Website of the year:
YTMND.com - I am addicted to this site. I could try to explain it, but just do yourself a favor and check it out yourself.
Oh the wait is killing us!
Some stuff to look forward to in the coming year:
December:
Wolf Creek - With Australia and Japan kicking our ass at the genre that we gave birth too, it is only fitting that Wolf Creek comes with all the horror fanboy hype that surrounded Saw and Haute Tension. Personally, I don't know much about the story, but putting it in the same sentence as those three has me on Fandango, preordering tickets as we speak.
January:
Hostel - It's been pushed around, bouncing from release on Christmas day all the way to Summer 06, but coming from God (Quentin "Costa" Tarantino, and our hope for the future (Eli Roth) bring you what is being called the most fucked up grindhouse torture picutre to hit major release. Considering this comes 6 months after The Devil's Rejects I'm primed. Roth's previous homage outing, Cabin Fever, was flawed, but ultimately does more right than wrong. He really could go either way. Hostel will show us which, and with Tarantino involved, I have a feeling it's all gravy.
The Shield - It's fifth and final season begins in January. Look for it all to come crashing down on Vic Mackey and his strike team as Ghost Dog comes in to kick some ass. Great show that hasn't been it's self lately looks to come back for a strong finish.
24 - If they go through with the balls to the wall rumor that I heard about the first episode, look for the craziest season yet. Jack Bauer, no matter how rediculous it gets, helms a show I watch week in and week out. Gravitas.
Scrubs - With AD currently somewhere in limbo, Scrubs will sit on top as the best comedy on Television. Ask me again if HBO or Showtime comes through.
Howard Stern begins on Sirius - 1.9.06, the face of radio changes forever. My hero Howard goes uncensored in a few short days. I have my radio, do you?
March:
Sopranos!! - The best of the best is back to show these come-lately dramas how it is done. Enough Said.
V for Vendetta - This one had me worried considering the Wachowski's tendency to fuck things up, but early buzz is great, and the source material is some good stuff. I'll be there.
Spring:
PS3, Halo 3 - Something tells me neither of these will actually hit in the spring, but if Halo 3 is even a shadow of the experience that 2 was for me, I can tell you that most of my time will be spent there.
June:
return of Rescue Me, 30 days - FX commences summer ownage with what is sure to be a tense season of Rescue Me and the only reality show that I watch that doesn't involve comedians of comedy, Spurlock's 30 days. Hopefully this time out we get to see more of Morgan.
Fall:
return of Nip/Tuck - This current fall's BEST show, and I will defend the finale to anyone that has a problem. I can't wait for this to come back. Faze has said that it is this show's MO to drop storylines and pick them up when it is convenient (Kit, Daugher Macnamara, Julia's Mother, No Carver for 6 episodes). Faze is a fan of Lost, and therefore has no credibility on the matter. Remember when there was a monster on the island? A hatch? A Science vs Faith argument? A crazy French lady and a Desmond? Some of this shit stretched across seasons and this guy can't cut Nip/Tuck ,in it's half the episode run and fifty times the quality characterization that comprises a LOST season, some slack.
August:
Sin City 2 - RobRod, the yin to Tarantino's yang brings you the second chapter of his Sin City translations. When he wants to, he can make a great picture, so look for this to be as great as the first.
Winter:
Nintendo Revolution - This console has a lot of the Gen-why crowd excited, and for good reason, though I think by the time it finally launches, XBOX live arcade will have stolen much of the thunder of the whole back catalog thing. Granted, they will never be able to get Nintendo's back catalog, which consists of most of the greatest games of all time, but to johnny not hardcore videogamer, the services will look the same, unless Nintendo's is free.
There's all I can think of..what about you?
December:
Wolf Creek - With Australia and Japan kicking our ass at the genre that we gave birth too, it is only fitting that Wolf Creek comes with all the horror fanboy hype that surrounded Saw and Haute Tension. Personally, I don't know much about the story, but putting it in the same sentence as those three has me on Fandango, preordering tickets as we speak.
January:
Hostel - It's been pushed around, bouncing from release on Christmas day all the way to Summer 06, but coming from God (Quentin "Costa" Tarantino, and our hope for the future (Eli Roth) bring you what is being called the most fucked up grindhouse torture picutre to hit major release. Considering this comes 6 months after The Devil's Rejects I'm primed. Roth's previous homage outing, Cabin Fever, was flawed, but ultimately does more right than wrong. He really could go either way. Hostel will show us which, and with Tarantino involved, I have a feeling it's all gravy.
The Shield - It's fifth and final season begins in January. Look for it all to come crashing down on Vic Mackey and his strike team as Ghost Dog comes in to kick some ass. Great show that hasn't been it's self lately looks to come back for a strong finish.
24 - If they go through with the balls to the wall rumor that I heard about the first episode, look for the craziest season yet. Jack Bauer, no matter how rediculous it gets, helms a show I watch week in and week out. Gravitas.
Scrubs - With AD currently somewhere in limbo, Scrubs will sit on top as the best comedy on Television. Ask me again if HBO or Showtime comes through.
Howard Stern begins on Sirius - 1.9.06, the face of radio changes forever. My hero Howard goes uncensored in a few short days. I have my radio, do you?
March:
Sopranos!! - The best of the best is back to show these come-lately dramas how it is done. Enough Said.
V for Vendetta - This one had me worried considering the Wachowski's tendency to fuck things up, but early buzz is great, and the source material is some good stuff. I'll be there.
Spring:
PS3, Halo 3 - Something tells me neither of these will actually hit in the spring, but if Halo 3 is even a shadow of the experience that 2 was for me, I can tell you that most of my time will be spent there.
June:
return of Rescue Me, 30 days - FX commences summer ownage with what is sure to be a tense season of Rescue Me and the only reality show that I watch that doesn't involve comedians of comedy, Spurlock's 30 days. Hopefully this time out we get to see more of Morgan.
Fall:
return of Nip/Tuck - This current fall's BEST show, and I will defend the finale to anyone that has a problem. I can't wait for this to come back. Faze has said that it is this show's MO to drop storylines and pick them up when it is convenient (Kit, Daugher Macnamara, Julia's Mother, No Carver for 6 episodes). Faze is a fan of Lost, and therefore has no credibility on the matter. Remember when there was a monster on the island? A hatch? A Science vs Faith argument? A crazy French lady and a Desmond? Some of this shit stretched across seasons and this guy can't cut Nip/Tuck ,in it's half the episode run and fifty times the quality characterization that comprises a LOST season, some slack.
August:
Sin City 2 - RobRod, the yin to Tarantino's yang brings you the second chapter of his Sin City translations. When he wants to, he can make a great picture, so look for this to be as great as the first.
Winter:
Nintendo Revolution - This console has a lot of the Gen-why crowd excited, and for good reason, though I think by the time it finally launches, XBOX live arcade will have stolen much of the thunder of the whole back catalog thing. Granted, they will never be able to get Nintendo's back catalog, which consists of most of the greatest games of all time, but to johnny not hardcore videogamer, the services will look the same, unless Nintendo's is free.
There's all I can think of..what about you?
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