Merry Christmas ya filthy animals. If you have been continually visiting this page looking for new posts, I applaud you. Chris has posted some nice thoughts about Rocky Balboa, which I should see by the end of this week.
I came across a movie trailer for a russian film, Derzkiedni. Even though "parkour" has been around for several years now, it is becoming all the rage on the movie screens. "Banlieu 13" aka "District B13" did it a couple years ago with the inventor of parkour David Belle, and the opening action scene of "Casino Royale" really popularized it because I know most Americans were wowed by that chase scene and kept telling me "i have never seen anything like that".
Now, the Ruskies are on board. While this trailer is totally in Russian, it does pose some important questions to me. What is up with that fat kid? What is up with the love interest's face? Do all Russians look that puny? What happened to the Ivan Drago-like race of super white men Russia is supposed to be full of? What happened to the mohawked spinning piledriving bear wrasslin giants? Come on Russia...you need to bring it like you brought it during the Cold War!
The movie itself looks pretty pedestrian, but it does seem to have some impressive stunt work.
Link to the movie home page
better link to the Rapidshare direct download site
Barely a Review: Rocky Balboa
30 years after the original took the nation by storm, Sylvester Stallone is back on the big screen in the iconic role of Rocky Balboa. The fact that Stallone was able to make this movie was a huge hurdle to clear. The fact that it's an honest to God good movie is an even greater feet of strength.
ROCKY BALBOA is a throwback to the original. The over-the-top theatrics of ROCKY III and IV (which I love) are nowhere to be seen as Stallone plays the character with gentle touches that make him seem more human than ever before. Stallone is smart enough to realize that the story of a near 60-year old man fighting a champion half his age is absurd, but if you can make the character grounded and likeable then the audience will go along for the ride.
This film washes out the bad taste left in the free world's mouth after ROCKY V. The series has come full circle. It started as an underdog story and it ends in the same fashion. It's not a perfect film but its flaws seem small compared to the joy in watching the series find solid footing before it rides off into the cinematic sunset.
Daybroken
Well ABC has decided to take a nice steaming Christmas dump on those (few) who were enjoying the hell out of their series "Daybreak." The show which starred Taye Diggs as a cop framed for murder and forced to relive the same day until he could clear his name has been pulled from the network's schedule.The ratings have been low for the show but when a network starts a series like "Daybreak," which they touted would run from start of the story to finish, and then kills it midway through they are really fucking themselves in the long run. Why should I start watching any "serialized" show that runs on ABC from here on out?
Word is that episodes of "Daybreak" will show up on ABC's website but that doesn't cut it. I'll sit through clips of stuff online but it's not the way I like to engage myself with hour long television shows. To watch something online for more than 10 minutes makes no sense if it won't end with multiple money shots. Hopefully the show will find a home on DVD.
You may have noticed the picture with this entry featuring the cast of "According to Jim." That's because this Wednesday at 9PM, "Daybreak's" former time slot, you can catch repeats of Jim Belushi's fascinating examination of the modern family. Joy to the world indeed.
Sleeper Cell Awakes
Last year at this time Showtime premiered their mini-series "Sleeper Cell" to little fanfare. Since that time the show remains one of the best kept secrets on television but the critical praise it garnered was enough for a new batch of episodes beginning tonight at 9 under the banner "Sleeper Cell: American Terror."To say the show is simply about terrorism doesn't explain the half of it. "Sleeper Cell" is perhaps the most interesting depiction of not only those in charge of stopping terrorism, but the actual terrorists themselves. One of its great gifts is the way it lulls you into a comfort level to the point where you actually like the members of the terror cell, then they'll do something that'll turn your stomach and remind you how far they'll go for their cause.
"Sleeper Cell: American Terror" will run a new episode each night between tonight, December 10th thru December 17th. Viewers with access to Showtime On-Demand have the ability to watch all the episodes starting this evening. Though I say that's cheating.
Olyphant Targeted for Hitman
Timothy Olyphant is getting quite the reputation for picking up roles vacated by other actors. He landed the part as the main villain in LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD when Jeffrey Wright dropped out and now he has been cast as the lead in a proposed HITMAN film based on the popular (Are they? I'm not really up on what games are popular anymore, "Frogger" sure was sweet) series of video games.
For a while the role of the kill-happy Agent 47 had Vin Diesel's name on it. Diesel's loss is his A MAN APART co-star Olyphant's gain who might be able to use this chance to jump into leading man status. Not sure why Diesel isn't attached to the project, perhaps he's more attached to being irrelevant.
Low blow, I know.
MyTube: Speechless
Well, I know I have called many of my previous YouTube posts "the best one ever". I probably overuse that title, and here we go again.
If I know our audience, and I think I do, I think you are going to fall in love with "Terminator vs. Robocop". No more explanation is needed. All we need to do now is sit in thanks of the genius behind this and his adept editing skills. Look for uses of footage from several other action classics! Part 1 and Part 2 follow...with a Part 3 IN THE WORKS!!!
(My only real issue lies with the winner of both struggles. I think we all know who would really win...)
If I know our audience, and I think I do, I think you are going to fall in love with "Terminator vs. Robocop". No more explanation is needed. All we need to do now is sit in thanks of the genius behind this and his adept editing skills. Look for uses of footage from several other action classics! Part 1 and Part 2 follow...with a Part 3 IN THE WORKS!!!
(My only real issue lies with the winner of both struggles. I think we all know who would really win...)
Ricky, I mean Rick Schroder joins 24.
As the new year approaches, so too does the new day of "24." The show has assembled a great group of guest stars for the upcoming 6th season and apparently there are still more actors needed to either help save the world or blow it up.
The newest addition to the cast is Rick Schroder. He'll be playing CTU operative Mike Doyle, described as Jack Bauer's "go-to man in the field" which I think translates to "will die horribly." Schroder joins a roster for the new season that already includes Peter MacNicol, James Cromwell, Kal Penn, and Powers Boothe as the Vice President (if only!).
The 5th season of "24" arrives on DVD tomorrow. As much as I like the show I stopped buying the seasons after the first 2. The DVD set contains a short prequel for the new season which can already be seen on Youtube here.
Stallone: Revealed!
I’m not a big fan of Aint It Cool News. I don’t like the site’s design, the talkbacks make me weep for humanity, and those animated scenes at the top showing Harry Knowles in famous movie moments make him look far better than the slob he actually is. But I do give credit where credit is due and they have started running a feature that has been a lot of fun to read.Apparently Sylvester Stallone contacted Knowles and wanted questions from his readership. So starting last Friday Stallone has been answering 10 questions a day about everything from the upcoming ROCKY BALBOA to what was the proper way to use the 3 seashells from DEMOLITION MAN. Supposedly there will be 200 questions answered and so far Stallone has been going into good detail with his responses.
You can check out the first 10 questions here. There has been a new batch of 10 added each day and if they stay on schedule there will be enough new ones to keep us occupied until ROCKY BALBOA is released on December 20th.
Prayers for Piper
It was only a few weeks ago that I spoke about the 3-disc set released by the WWE dedicated to the career of Roddy Piper. Well it would seem that the toughest challenge to face Piper isn't mentioned on that disc. That's because he has been diagnosed with Hodgkin's lymphoma.
Piper was sent home early from a WWE tour of the United Kingdom and was hospitalized where doctors removed a mass near his spinal cord which contained an enlarged lymph node. The mass was completely removed, but the lymph node tested positive for Hodgkin's lymphoma.
If there's one thing Piper has shown throughout his life it's that you can't keep a good man down. I have no doubt that he'll dropkick lymphoma and show the world that heaven is going to have to find another angel for the time being.
Stealing Cable T-shirt Store: OPEN FOR BUSINESS
Well, there is only one t-shirt in the inventory right now. It won't win any design awards, but heck I put it together because I wanted to show my support for "Passenger 57" himself. Anyway, you can go here to reach Stealing Cable's Cafe Press store. I don't plan on making any money off this, so its going to cost you the same amount it would to make your own t-shirt on Cafe Press.
So, visit the store. Buy some shirts. Support Wesley.
CafePress Stealing Cable store link
I Can't Believe it. A Remake of a Horror Film!
I'm not sure when it became law to remake every single horror film made before 1995 but we need to put a stop to it before Vern Troyer is cast in an updated version of LEPRECHAUN. Until then we'll just have to continue eating up this slop.Due in theaters this January is a remake of THE HITCHER, the 1986 film in which Rutger Hauer hitches a ride from C. Thomas Howell and then spends the rest of the movie trying to kill him and anybody around with a pulse. Hauer was the villain in the film but I ask you this, wouldn't we all kill C. Thomas Howell if we had the chance? I'm just kidding, I love C. Thomas. With the exception of former Surgeon General C. Everett Koop he's my favorite person in the world who begins his name with the initial C. If Howell grows a funny beard maybe I'll reconsider and put him in the top spot.
The new HITCHER stars Sean Bean as the maniac passenger known as John Ryder. I'd look to see the names of the youngsters he'll be terrorizing but it doesn't matter. They're interchangable with the young actors who will star in whatever horror movie opens the week after THE HITCHER. Here's the trailer which looks to keep things pretty close to the original, so close that you may as well do yourself a favor and just watch the original.
Hey New Orleans you're gonna be ok: COMIC RELIEF 2006
You know, I dont think I have ever seen a full Comic Relief special. I have probably seen bits and pieces of many of them, but I just remember damning my parents for not having HBO because on that channel you could curse, Robin Williams would be coked out of his mind but still funnier than anyone in the room, Billy Crystal could make hilarious observations about old Jewish people, Andrew "Dice" Clay (I think he was on a couple of these specials) could make jokes full of sexual innuendo that would go right over my 10 year old head, and you could watch Whoopi Goldberg...um...stand there?
Well, after a long hiatus the trio is back (sadly sans the "Dice" man)! They are putting on another Comic Relief to benefit the Hurricane ravaged south. There are going to be a ton of comedians on it. Also in attendance will be the obligatory Dane Cook appearance (I still think he is funny, but I think his agent needs to be more choosy from now on). The always hilarious Rebecca Romjin (wtf?) and New Orleans Brass/Funk/Rock fusion band "Bonerama" (they aren't comedians. there is no relationship to "Growing Pains". I checked. just poor choice of name.) But more importantly, its also going to be broadcast on TBS, this Saturday night. I am not sure if the TBS broadcast will differ from the HBO one outside of bleeping, but either way it should be cool.
Comic Relief Homepage for more info
Well, after a long hiatus the trio is back (sadly sans the "Dice" man)! They are putting on another Comic Relief to benefit the Hurricane ravaged south. There are going to be a ton of comedians on it. Also in attendance will be the obligatory Dane Cook appearance (I still think he is funny, but I think his agent needs to be more choosy from now on). The always hilarious Rebecca Romjin (wtf?) and New Orleans Brass/Funk/Rock fusion band "Bonerama" (they aren't comedians. there is no relationship to "Growing Pains". I checked. just poor choice of name.) But more importantly, its also going to be broadcast on TBS, this Saturday night. I am not sure if the TBS broadcast will differ from the HBO one outside of bleeping, but either way it should be cool.
Comic Relief Homepage for more info
I Diggs This New Show
With "Lost" on hiatus for the next few months it's going to take quite a show to hold down the fort for ABC on Wednesdays. Judging by last night's premiere of "Daybreak" I do believe they have done just that.
"Daybreak" stars Taye Diggs, perhaps you remember him from that time he gave groove back to Stella, as a cop who wakes one day to find himself framed for murder and on the run from his fellow officers, not to mention a mystery group of men dressed in black who are quite eager to see him confess to the murder. The kicker is that Diggs' character is forced to relive this day over and over again until he gets it right. Yes, this is the same premise as GROUNDHOG DAY. But if network television can air 3 versions of "CSI" I'm fairly certain it can survive a show that swipes heavily from a 13 year-old movie.
So far I like what I'm seeing. Diggs is backed up with a good supporting cast that includes Adam Baldwin, Jonathan Banks, and a smoking gal named Moon Bloodgood who plays Diggs' girlfriend. It should also be noted that Moon Bloodgood is the coolest name ever.
I'm interested in seeing if the show can keep each new version of the same day fresh. If it can accomplish that then we're gonna be in for a fun couple of months following this story play out. If you missed the 2-hour premiere you can head over here and check it out on ABC's website.
Look what's coming out on DVD, you little jerks!
It's no big revelation to say the holiday season has inspired a glut of terrible family films that nevertheless still turn a profit--even Tim Allen has successfully managed to fight off oblivion, after all. The bright side of such dire industry-enforced lowered expecations is that when a truly great holiday-themed film is made, it sticks out like Rudolph's big red glowing phallus, and inspires the same kind of unadulterated joy for generations to come. Chief among them, at least for my money, is 1990's life-altering Christmas megahit Home Alone, which is getting an extreme DVD makeover just in time for, uh, next Tuesday.
I don't think there's a person in America who needs a plot synopsis, so I'll move directly to the extras. There are several behind-the-scenes featurettes, one of them guided by the "Mac" himself, and of course a blooper reel and a set of deleted scenes. The features that make this release worth more than a rental however include: "Where's Buzz Now?," which offers a variety of hypotheses on where Kevin's big ugly brother might be today. I'd like to think he's off somewhere punching nerds with Chet from Weird Science and Wayne Arnold from The Wonder Years. Also included--uncut--is the infamous clip from "Angels With Filthy Souls" that Kevin uses to such great effect. And the icing on this booby-trapped gingerbread house is a newly-recorded feature-length commentary from Chris Columbus and Macaulay Culkin. I don't think there's a better way to spend Christmas Day than watching the Wet Bandits get torn to shreds by a precocious twirp. So this Tuesday I suggest you--as I will--go to your favorite video store, fork over a $20, and tell whoever's at the register to "Keep the change, ya filthy animal!" And then--as I will--take the change anyway.
DVD Goodness: The Roddy Piper Story
The past few years the WWE has been honoring their legends with in-depth DVDs chronicling their greatest moments. Finally there's one of these suckers that I have to get my mitts on. It's titled "Born to Controversy: The Roddy Piper Story" and it hits stores Tuesday.
Roddy Piper is simply put the greatest wrestler since the dawn of man. He may not be some steroid chugging behemoth. But those guys are a dime a dozen. Piper was all about using his big mouth to get the job done. Nobody talked trash better than Piper. He eventually took his charm and wit and applied it to motion pictures. As much as I enjoyed The Rock in THE RUNDOWN, Piper's role in THEY LIVE remains the greatest performance by a wrestler in film.
Included in the 3-disc set are several of Piper's signature matches. What I'm really looking forward to is Piper's legendary "Wrestlemania 2" boxing match against Mr. T. I'm sure the set will also offer up plenty of segments from "Piper's Pit," where Roddy would interview his fellow wrestlers and commonly end these chats by beating the snot out of his guests. I'd like to see Charlie Rose try that!
DVD Goodness: The Sopranos Season 6, Part 1
The 2 best shows on television for my money are "The Sopranos" and "The Shield." They're to TV what Ali/Frazier were to boxing. During their most recent seasons I found "The Shield" finally delivered a knockout to "The Sopranos" but that's not to say the mob drama was lackluster. This week part 1 of the 6th "Sopranos" season comes to DVD in a standard no frills release that has unfortunately been the norm for the program's DVD releases.I never let the lack of features (or the jacked up HBO DVD prices) on "The Sopranos" sets sway me from purchasing them. I always find it great to rewatch the shows on disc because I'm bound to have missed some key details during its original run. Besides, the episode where Christopher heads to LA and schmoozes with Ben Kingsley is worth whatever price being asked.
The 2nd part of the 6th (and final?) season is scheduled to start in March. That is unless James Gandolfini stubs his toe in which case the premiere will be pushed back to April of 2012.
MyTube: 28 Days Slater
Apparently, team tiger awesome is made up of geniuses. Who are they? A group of people who got together to make comedy films. Apparently this series got a lot of play on Channel 102, which I probably don't frequent enough (probably because most of the stuff on there sucks ass). If you are a fan of Saved by the Bell, you are going to love this. The series of videos is quite epic in scope and needs little introduction. Just know this, it freaking rocks...preppy.
The series is 5 videos long...and parts of it contain boobs, so its definitely NSFW (not safe for work).
The series is 5 videos long...and parts of it contain boobs, so its definitely NSFW (not safe for work).
MyTube: BORAT...THE SOUNDTRACK
So, I don't think any amount of overexposure can prepare America for B-Day (November 3rd).
In my original review in May, I stated that Borat is one of the funniest films of the past decade. I stand by it totally.
Yesterday, the Borat Movie Soundtrack was released with plenty of original material including "You Be My Wife" and a Borat version of the Steppenwolf classic "Born To Be Wild".
Here is the infomercial for the soundtrack, and a link to the full version of "You Be My Wife"
Posted By:Borat
In my original review in May, I stated that Borat is one of the funniest films of the past decade. I stand by it totally.
Yesterday, the Borat Movie Soundtrack was released with plenty of original material including "You Be My Wife" and a Borat version of the Steppenwolf classic "Born To Be Wild".
Here is the infomercial for the soundtrack, and a link to the full version of "You Be My Wife"
Posted By:Borat
South Park: Still Crazy After All These Years
It has almost been 10 years since "South Park" hit the airwaves. But unlike some animated comedies (cough, oh fuck the cough I'm clearly talking about "The Simpsons"), "South Park" still gets under skin with the best of them. The most recent fracas concerns last week's episode in which Steve Irwin is depicted attending Satan's Halloween party, along with the stingray that killed him still attached to his chest.To be fair, the person who is most upset is Irwin's widow. I guess I can't blame her. If someone made fun of my loved one's death I'd be a bit steamed too. But anybody not related to the former hunter of crocodiles who feels offended should just cram it. Poor taste or not, the bit is extremely funny.
With all the new animated comedies that have popped up the last couple of years it's easy to forget how impressive "South Park's" run has been. This current season has had some classic episodes that have perfectly lampooned everything from online gaming to female teachers banging their male students. Now is definitely the time to rediscover the show if you have let your viewership lapse.
To check out the "Irwin incident" click here.
MyTube: JAMMX...the return of the bobb'e j
We recently commented on Tracy Morgan's new show "30 Rock"...its good. Watch it.
But Mr. Morgan had previously gotten a family sitcom on NBC, called "The Tracy Morgan Show", while the likes of me and worry loved it, NBC didn't believe in it. But there was one discovery in that show that not even NBC could kill...Bobb'e J Thompson. He played Tracy Morgan's youngest son...and he was hilarious. Apparently he has also been in a bunch of episodes of "That's so Raven". Anyway, not only does the kid own one of the wildest uses of the apostrophe ever, but he also is mad talented.
He has been part of Jammx kids music club or something for some years now. Apparently they are still making videos. Bobb'e J raps in it! Shaq Fu himself is in it too! Unfortunately he isn't rapping in it, but I remedied that by posting one of the "Diesel"s classics.
But Mr. Morgan had previously gotten a family sitcom on NBC, called "The Tracy Morgan Show", while the likes of me and worry loved it, NBC didn't believe in it. But there was one discovery in that show that not even NBC could kill...Bobb'e J Thompson. He played Tracy Morgan's youngest son...and he was hilarious. Apparently he has also been in a bunch of episodes of "That's so Raven". Anyway, not only does the kid own one of the wildest uses of the apostrophe ever, but he also is mad talented.
He has been part of Jammx kids music club or something for some years now. Apparently they are still making videos. Bobb'e J raps in it! Shaq Fu himself is in it too! Unfortunately he isn't rapping in it, but I remedied that by posting one of the "Diesel"s classics.
Beep Boop Beep Boop...
Even though we're still over 2 months away from the new season of "24," a trailer of season 6 has just become available. Those hoping to have "Day 6" revolve around Jack Bauer's quest to flee his Chinese captors will probably be pissed as it looks like that plotline will be wrapped up within the first hour of the new day. In fact it looks as though the obstacle facing Bauer will be of the Muslim variety which appears to be how this show likes to go for the even numbered seasons.The show is coming off an Emmy win for Best Drama which is really sort of insane. I enjoy "24" plenty but it's not exactly the ideal destination for interesting characters or sharp dialogue. But no matter, as soon as this season finds Bauer stabbing terrorists in the throat I'll forget all about its faults and just concentrate on all the severe beatings he'll likely dish out.
The new season kicks off with a 2 hour premiere on January 14th. The trailer can be viewed here. For a look back at my favorite moment from season 5 click here.
From Deadwood to Die Hard
A couple weeks ago we reported, more like regurgitated, the news that Jeffrey Wright had been cast as the villain in LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD. It appears that deal either fell through or wasn't true because now several sites (still good enough for me!) are reporting that "Deadwood" star Timothy Olyphant has been tapped to play John McClane's main nemesis.Olyphant's character is described as a mysterious figure behind an attack on the U.S.' computer infrastructure that begins to shut down the country. The character has planned out every angle to his scheme, except for the old-fashioned "analog" McClane. I suppose that means McClane will not spend the entire film at a keyboard eating Hot Pockets.
I've tried to get into "Deadwood" but it just hasn't clicked with me. It's not Olyphant's fault who does a nice job as one of the show's leads, I just find the pacing of the show beyond lethargic. I have enjoyed him in a few films like GO and A MAN APART so I'm optimistic that he can give Bruce Willis a decent run for his money. Though just as I said when it looked like Jeffrey Wright had the role, Olyphant is not the kind of name that's going to get people buzzing about the 4th DIE HARD. I guess it's just going to have to be an actual good movie.
MyTube: Diddy...what is wrong with you?
I am sure many of you have seen this now famous video blog of Sean "P.Diddy" Combs explaining how good it feels to take a piss. If you haven't...watch and then continue reading.
Ok, he just released a new video last week for the dropping of his new album (if a washed up producer/semi-rapper drops an album, but no one is there to hear it, does it make a heavily sampled sound?). What is wrong with this guy? He makes it sound like this is an impromptu thing, but then he took the time to have it done in black and white, professionally edited, and have that weird serial killer interrogation piano music play in the background? I also enjoy how he conveniently rubs his eyes when he states "it's like 3 in the morning". Please enjoy Diddy's feelings exposed.
Ok, he just released a new video last week for the dropping of his new album (if a washed up producer/semi-rapper drops an album, but no one is there to hear it, does it make a heavily sampled sound?). What is wrong with this guy? He makes it sound like this is an impromptu thing, but then he took the time to have it done in black and white, professionally edited, and have that weird serial killer interrogation piano music play in the background? I also enjoy how he conveniently rubs his eyes when he states "it's like 3 in the morning". Please enjoy Diddy's feelings exposed.
VH1 Hip Hop Honors Class of 2006 Tonight
VH1's "Hip Hop Honors Show" has been one of my fave awards/music events of the past 2 years. The first one was really well thought out and put together by people who definitely understood the history of hip hop does not begin in 1995. They honored the early pioneers like Grandmaster Flash and even DJ hollywood, who wasn't even a rapper just a guy with big ass speakers in the back of his cadillac who put on block parties. Nelson George, resident intelligent black guy writer about hip hop, has an obvious hand in putting together these shows for VH1 and it shows.
I think the second show really knocked it out of the park though. The performances became more of a spectacle bringing together the old and the new. One of my faves had to be when Common, TI (the only guy who didn't belong there), and the Roots came out and paid tribute to Big Daddy Kane with a massive medley of his greatest hits.
youtube of the performance
This year's class is very impressive: Afrikaa Bambataa, the Beasties, Easy E, Ice Cube, MC Lyte, Rakim (!!!), Russel Simmons, and of course the 36 chambers of the Wu-Tang Clan.
I can't wait to see these performances. Check it out tonight on VH1 at 9pm or multiple times throughout the week in reruns.
I think the second show really knocked it out of the park though. The performances became more of a spectacle bringing together the old and the new. One of my faves had to be when Common, TI (the only guy who didn't belong there), and the Roots came out and paid tribute to Big Daddy Kane with a massive medley of his greatest hits.
youtube of the performance
This year's class is very impressive: Afrikaa Bambataa, the Beasties, Easy E, Ice Cube, MC Lyte, Rakim (!!!), Russel Simmons, and of course the 36 chambers of the Wu-Tang Clan.
I can't wait to see these performances. Check it out tonight on VH1 at 9pm or multiple times throughout the week in reruns.
White Men Can't Jump...but they can get away with tax fraud
Well, StealingCable favorite Wesley Snipes is at it again. This time he is fighting a corrupt government, who is accusing him of stealing millions of dollars that he undoubtedly gave to the poor. Only this time, it's real life, and Snipes is the poor. The IRS is accusing Snipes and his accountant of stealing something like 12 million dollars by filing fraudulent tax returns. On top of that, he apparently didn't pay any taxes between 1999 and 2004 (that's a good accountant!). This story makes me wonder why a 1990s action movie star, who is now one of the hot new direct to video commodities, needs to steal money? I mean the guy just released "The Detonator" (on video store shelves now!).
Anyway, I wish him the best. If this does go to trial, I think Snipes should channel some Nino Brown and drop this soliloquy on the masses (just replace drugs with taxes): "I'm not guilty. *You're* the one that's guilty. The lawmakers, the politicians, the Columbian drug lords, all you who lobby against making drugs legal. Just like you did with alcohol during the prohibition. You're the one who's guilty. I mean, c'mon, let's kick the ballistics here: Ain't no Uzi's made in Harlem. Not one of us in here owns a poppy field. This thing is bigger than Nino Brown. This is big business. This is the American way."
theSuperficial link
Save this Show: Friday Night Lights
After viewing episode 2 of NBC's "Friday Night Lights" I felt very comfortable calling it my favorite new show of the season. It manages to maintain a sense of realism without falling too much into sports movie cliche territory. All the characters are fully developed. Having the actor who plays Matt Sarecen, Zach Gilford, basically be the lead of the show is pretty gutsy. He actually looks like a goofy high school kid. Kyle Chandler is pretty fantastic as the coach. I believe that the townsfolk are actual townsfolk of a small town in Texas. But I think the most impressive part about the show is that when I watch it, I almost get fooled into thinking this is a documentary. Sure the shaky handicam photography can get a bit annoying, but it definitely gets the job done.
Anyway, this show has been basically killed by "dancing with the stars". So, I appeal to you, our 20 readers to start watching "Friday Night Lights" on NBC. It airs Tuesday nights at 8pm.
Anyway, this show has been basically killed by "dancing with the stars". So, I appeal to you, our 20 readers to start watching "Friday Night Lights" on NBC. It airs Tuesday nights at 8pm.
Mini Review: The Marine
THE MARINE attacked theaters this weekend and took no prisoners on its way to 6th place at the box office. But it's the #1 non-sequel, non-prequel, non-comedy, non-animated, non-remake film in the country. Go Cena!I'm not going to waste too many words on this movie. It's dumber than a semi-regular Arby's customer. There's nothing original about it. It's also heavily watered down to maintain a PG-13 rating.
But I'm gonna say that I didn't hate it, and at times I even had some jolly good fun. Pretty much any positives to come out of this mess are thanks to Robert Patrick. He's obviously having a blast hamming it up as the villainous jewel thief Rome. I doubt we'll be seeing John Cena headlining another film, at least not a theatrical film, anytime soon but I hope we see Robert Patrick in larger roles in major movies. He does appear in FLAGS OF OUR FATHERS opening this Friday and is co-starring with Matthew McConaughey this Christmas in the football drama WE ARE MARSHALL.
The Tracy Morgan Show II (30 Rock)
Watch NBC's "30 Rock".
It is funny. It is Tina Fey's behind the scenes of a late night sketch comedy sitcom. Tina Fey is a serviceable writer, but a pretty poor actress. On top of that, she still has a lot of left over junk in her trunk from her baby bearing. She is not that funny in a sitcom setting, and she isn't that good to look at, excpet for playing "spot the screwed up cheek of hers".
There is one reason to watch "30 Rock" and it is TRACY MORGAN. It seems like Morgan gets a script with a general idea of what he is supposed to do, and then throws it out of the window and just goes wild tossing around conspiracy theories about AIDS in chicken nuggets and sex with strippers. It is Morgan at his best. I applaud Tina Fey for getting this guy on the show rather than some unfunny black comedian...*cough*DL HUGHLEY*cough*.
I hope we get to see more of "30 Rock" solely for Morgan's ad libbing. It's on Wednesdays at 8. I also think bravo will be rerunning it throughout the week like they do with all of NBC's other big shows.
P.S. Let me take this opportunity to reiterate how much I hate the Christian chick on "studio 60". Her on again off again romance with Matthew Perry's character is almost killing entire episodes. I mean come on Sorkin, having an ex walk in on his old lady making out with some other dude and when he tries to sneak away he runs into something causing a clamor? I think every TGIF show did that storyline already...9000 times.
Infernal Affairs: Redux (The Departed)
I saw Infernal Affairs today...except it starred a bunch of white people. This is just a message for all those falling all over themselves in adulation of Scorcese's latest film, "The Departed", "written" by William Moynahan.
THIS MOVIE WAS ALREADY MADE, AND IT ENDED MUCH BETTER.
I actually thought Scorcese was going to add something new, but instead the entire plot even down to the comedy bits was exactly the same, and the stuff they did change wasn't for the better. I expected more from "Marty", and you know what I wouldnt be surprised if this is the film that gets Scorcese his Oscar. And when he wins it everyone will say "finally he got one!!!", yea off the coat tails of a Andrew Lau, Alan Mak, Andy Lau, and Tony Leung. As far as the acting, Leo did a pretty good job, but he is no Tony Leung, who gave a freaking masterful performance as the undercover cop.
The other thing that bothered me is with all the press and hype surrounding "The Departed", only one person really gave more than just lip service credit to Andrew Lau and Alan Mak's "Infernal Affairs"...and it was Anthony Anderson. I don't know what that means.
Do yourselves a favor guys, go rent "Infernal Affairs" and give it a viewing. It is just done much better. Sure it doesnt have as much cursing in it, has subtitles, and the actors aren't dreamboats like leo and matt and marky mark, but it is just more enjoyable.
DVD Goodness: Black Rain
Hitting DVD this week is a "Special Collector's Edition" of BLACK RAIN. It's the gritty tale of 2 New York cops, played by Michael Douglas and Andy Garcia, who are assigned to transport a prisoner to his native Japan. What begins as a routine task eventually plunges these cops into a culture they know nothing of and a criminal underworld full of violence and mayhem.The film really is one of those overlooked gems that seems to get better as the years go on. After FALLING DOWN it's my favorite performance from Douglas and the rest of the cast is all in top form. But the man who deserves most of the credit for its success is director Ridley Scott. He is able to take a relatively straight-forward tale of crime and revenge and, with help from a well written script, add layers to the characters that you don't normally find in films of this genre.
This new DVD, a welcome upgrade from the previous bland BLACK RAIN disc, includes an extensive behind the scenes look at the film from how the idea was developed into a script all the way through the editing process. A Ridley Scott commentary is also featured. Whether you've never seen the movie, or haven't in a while, this DVD is just the excuse you need to give it a look.
The Price is Right...For Bosoms!
I've been watching "The Price is Right" for as long as I can remember. Not everyday mind you, what kind of loser do you do take me for? But it's always nice on a rare holiday or on a day you call in sick when you're not really sick to get under the covers and spend an hour with Bob Barker, AKA an old man who has gotten plenty of ass but doesn't throw it everyone's face like that jerk Hugh Hefner.
I'll admit that when I'm able to watch the show I'm all business. There's always a lot of eye candy on display but I find it usually serves to distract me from my objective of correctly guessing the price of a cotton candy machine. So I'm glad somebody has put together a nice montage of some of the more jiggle-tastic moments that the program has long been famous for. Enjoy.
Shane Black Week/Month: The Last Boy Scout
Joe Hallenbeck: This is the nineties. You don't just go around punching people. You have to say something cool first.
If one quote could sum up Shane Black's "The Last Boy Scout", I think that would be it. TLBS may be Shane Black's most quotable script ever. I would just direct you to IMDB's memorabl quotes section to view the gems for yourself. I think its also probably Black's funniest script to date. He really went out of his way to jam tons of zingers for the two main protagonists, Joe Hallenbeck and Jimmy Dix, and a lot for the villains as well.
As for the movie itself, I think it can be considered a nice bookend piece to Shane Black's career in the "buddy action genre", for which he is often credited as the guy who perfected it. Its funny because if you look at his filmography, Black has only really written a handful of movies. Before TLBS, he had only done Lethal Weapon, Monster Squad (he has stated the film bares little resemblance to his script), and Lethal Weapon 2 (plus a ton of uncredited script doctoring). He definitely gave it his all here.
The movie itself probably would never work without Bruce Willis as private dick Joe Hallenbeck. I can't think of another actor in the world who can play the "calm, cool, collected smart ass, who gets beat up a lot but still comes out the hero". He did it wonderfully in the Die Hard Series. He does it masterfully in TLBS. I think Black's quips were almost tailor made for Willis deadpan delivery. If anyone else tried to say them, like say a C. Thomas Howell, it would come out very very bad and I mean "Soul Man" bad. I definitely put Joe Hallenbeck up there as one of Bruno's greatest roles.
Next, lets touch on the enigma that is Damon Q. Wayans. What the hell happened to this guy's career? The guy is fantastic in TLBS. I am sure a lot of it had to do with the script, but the guy is a solid actor as well. I remember when he left "In Living Color" there was a lot of buzz about what he was going to do and after TLBS and "Mo' Money" came questionable material like "Blank Man" and the uber horrible "Major Payne". Wayans' turn as Jimmy Dix, disgraced pro football star, was really quite excellent. Its easily his best role on film. My favorite line would be this one:
Joe: Where you going?
Jimmy: The bathroom. Doctor told me not to lift anything heavy, you wanna help?
As far as the actual movie, its your classic Los Angeles story involving crooked senators and football team owners trying to get gambling legalized only to have a washed up private detective and ex-football star stumble into the situation. There are some very nice set pieces (it is a Shane Black script after all), which are pretty well directed by Tony Scott. He seems to have controlled himself a bit more in this film and sort of let the scenes play out without adding in jump cuts and all the MTV crap he does now.
Overall, "The Last Boy Scout" is probably one of my favorite films of the 1990's, even though it was released in 1991. It really didn't do as well as it should have at the box office, but isn't that always the case with movies like this. It really is quite a gem that I would highly recommend to anyone who enjoys quality action movies.
If one quote could sum up Shane Black's "The Last Boy Scout", I think that would be it. TLBS may be Shane Black's most quotable script ever. I would just direct you to IMDB's memorabl quotes section to view the gems for yourself. I think its also probably Black's funniest script to date. He really went out of his way to jam tons of zingers for the two main protagonists, Joe Hallenbeck and Jimmy Dix, and a lot for the villains as well.
As for the movie itself, I think it can be considered a nice bookend piece to Shane Black's career in the "buddy action genre", for which he is often credited as the guy who perfected it. Its funny because if you look at his filmography, Black has only really written a handful of movies. Before TLBS, he had only done Lethal Weapon, Monster Squad (he has stated the film bares little resemblance to his script), and Lethal Weapon 2 (plus a ton of uncredited script doctoring). He definitely gave it his all here.
The movie itself probably would never work without Bruce Willis as private dick Joe Hallenbeck. I can't think of another actor in the world who can play the "calm, cool, collected smart ass, who gets beat up a lot but still comes out the hero". He did it wonderfully in the Die Hard Series. He does it masterfully in TLBS. I think Black's quips were almost tailor made for Willis deadpan delivery. If anyone else tried to say them, like say a C. Thomas Howell, it would come out very very bad and I mean "Soul Man" bad. I definitely put Joe Hallenbeck up there as one of Bruno's greatest roles.
Next, lets touch on the enigma that is Damon Q. Wayans. What the hell happened to this guy's career? The guy is fantastic in TLBS. I am sure a lot of it had to do with the script, but the guy is a solid actor as well. I remember when he left "In Living Color" there was a lot of buzz about what he was going to do and after TLBS and "Mo' Money" came questionable material like "Blank Man" and the uber horrible "Major Payne". Wayans' turn as Jimmy Dix, disgraced pro football star, was really quite excellent. Its easily his best role on film. My favorite line would be this one:
Joe: Where you going?
Jimmy: The bathroom. Doctor told me not to lift anything heavy, you wanna help?
As far as the actual movie, its your classic Los Angeles story involving crooked senators and football team owners trying to get gambling legalized only to have a washed up private detective and ex-football star stumble into the situation. There are some very nice set pieces (it is a Shane Black script after all), which are pretty well directed by Tony Scott. He seems to have controlled himself a bit more in this film and sort of let the scenes play out without adding in jump cuts and all the MTV crap he does now.
Overall, "The Last Boy Scout" is probably one of my favorite films of the 1990's, even though it was released in 1991. It really didn't do as well as it should have at the box office, but isn't that always the case with movies like this. It really is quite a gem that I would highly recommend to anyone who enjoys quality action movies.
Smith, We Hardly Knew Ya!
The new TV season is still in its infancy and already the rookie shows are dropping. That happens every year but usually the first shows to get axed are ones you could see coming a mile away. The biggest casuality so far is "Smith," CBS' crime drama that boasted an impressive cast including Ray Liotta and Virginia Madsen.I liked "Smith." It wasn't groundbreaking and I'm sure I'll be able to go on with my life Smithless but it was an entertaining show and one of the few new shows I've watched more than once. "Smith" is a good example of what can happen to a serialized drama if it doesn't catch on quick with the networks. Shows like "Lost" and "24" are the exception to that rule. It would be great if a cable network like Spike, since like CBS they're owned by Viacom, could show whatever episodes of "Smith" are in the can but I won't hold my breath on that happening.
Meanwhile NBC has dumped its drama "Kidnapped" to the Saturday graveyard where it will finish out its run. There has also been a lot of talk as to what to do with "Studio 60," which continues to lose viewers as the weeks go by. Though with all the talent and money that NBC has devoted to "Studio 60" I don't see it leaving the airwaves without a huge effort being made to get it seen by as many people as possible.
As for the cast of "Smith," Liotta fans like myself can look forward to seeing him in the sure to be a blast film SMOKIN' ACES due out next Spring. I don't know what Vrginia Madsen has lined up but rest assured I will continue to fantasize about showering with her while her brother Michael watches us. Good times.
McClane Gets a New Foe
LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD, the next entry in the DIE HARD series has been filming for a couple weeks but only now has the villain been cast. Though not officially announced, several sites (good enough for me!) are reporting that Jeffrey Wright will be in charge of making John McClane sweat, curse, and hopefully shoot many people.Wright is a good actor and when compared to a lot of the other aspects to this sequel it's about the best news I've heard. Still, I was sort of hoping an actor would be cast that would really get me excited. For some reason my mind was telling me James Gandolfini would get the gig. He was never rumored or anything, but I just had a vision of him in a DIE HARD film. Most of my visions involve James Gandolfini so it's probably my problem.
That picture to the left is a shot of Willis on the set of LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD. I swear to God it is not a picture of Robert Schimmel.
MyTube: House of Horrors/Carters
Shane Black week will continue with my thoughts on "The Last Boyscout" hopefully later today, and if I am feeling up to it, bonus thoughts on "Predator". I know I could comment on how intriguing/annoying "Heroes" is (that cheerleader chick needs to go), or how entertaining "Jericho" has been, or how engrossing "Studio 60" has been, or the far too obvious reminder about "Lost" returning tonight, but after seeing this leaked clip from E!'s new reality juggernaut "House of Carters" I think I will definitely be watching this show. Enjoy...
(Thanks to The Superficial.com (fantastic site btw) for the heads up)
(Thanks to The Superficial.com (fantastic site btw) for the heads up)
Good Cop, Better Killer
Showtime has been hit or miss with me when it comes to their most recent shows. "Brotherhood" turned out out to be a decent drama, and somehow got renewed for a 2nd season. On the flipside their is "The Underground," an utterly terrible attempt by Damon Wayans to do shocking sketch comedy. Tonight at 10 PM they'll premiere "Dexter," which seems to have the potential to be a rather original cop drama.
"Dexter" stars Michael C. Hall of "Six Feet Under" as a Miami lawman by day and serial killer by night. The twist of the show comes from the fact that his victims are criminals themselves who have managed to evade the justice system.
I like the idea of the show and hope the execution is just as good. I never watched "Six Feet Under" so I really have no expectations, either good or bad, when it comes to Hall. I'm mainly just looking for a cop show that won't bore the hell out of me and help pass the time until "The Shield" comes back in the (fuck!) spring.
SALUTE DE SOUZA!
In all the pandemonium going on to celebrate the work of Shane Black, I feel it’s important to also pay tribute to a writer who had his hand in the scripts of practically every marquee action film not written by Black. That man is Steven E de Souza.Unlike Black, de Souza did not hit it big right off the bat. He started out writing for television on shows such as “The Six Million Dollar Man” and “Knight Rider.” He first hit the cinema jackpot by contributing to the script for 48 HRS. That led to his involvement in many major films, including COMMANDO and THE RUNNING MAN. What also separates de Souza from Black is that he often was involved in projects with multiple writers on board, and in the case of THE RUNNING MAN he was given the task of adapting a Stephen King short story. This is no knock on de Souza, often adapting something into a screenplay is as tough as coming up with an original concept from scratch.
It was 1988 when de Souza, along with writer Jeb Stuart, essentially became immortal. Have you ever heard of the novel “Nothing Lasts Forever?” Not many have, but it served as the basis for a screenplay written by de Souza and Stuart. A screenplay titled DIE HARD. You’d be hard pressed to find a script for an action film that serves up as many interesting and/or entertaining characters as this one. There have been many imitators of the DIE HARD plot but I doubt anything will ever be able to top the amazing amount of fun the movie has to offer.
After DIE HARD de Souza was still involved in writing many huge, if not always beloved films. He co-wrote DIE HARD 2 which some folks consider the weakest of the series, not me though. From there he left his mark on HUDSON HAWK, (the underrated) RICOCHET, BEVERLY HILLS COP 3, and THE FLINTSTONES. Certainly a mixed bag right there but it was obvious that Hollywood had de Souza on the brain and it was inevitable that he would take a shot at directing a film.
In 1994 de Souza wrote and directed STREET FIGHTER. I’ve written about that film at length here before so all I’ll say now is that the movie is a total mess, a total delightful mess. The box office for STREET FIGHTER was decent but the writing was on the wall that de Souza’s time in the cinema sun was coming to a close. He worked on the script for JUDGE DREDD and penned the disastrous Van Damme flick KNOCK OFF. The party was over.
I’m not really sure if de Souza has been exiled from show business or has stayed relatively free of the industry by choice but the 21st century has been mainly de Souza free. The last script he wrote that was filmed was BLAST!, a DTV flick starring Eddie Griffin as a guy stopping terrorists from taking over an oil rig. I have not seen BLAST! This is saying something because I watch all sorts of shitty movies. But even I have my limits and they usually involve Eddie Griffin.
It’s often that you hear people wish for a comeback for the action icons of yesterday. But it’s not so often where people clamor for the comebacks of the people behind the scenes that were involved in classic action films. De Souza deserves such a comeback. He has a few projects in the works but it’s tough to tell whether they have any substance or are just IMDB pipe-dreams. No matter what he does in the future his legacy will live on in the DVD collections of men age 18-80 forever.
Shane Black Week: KISS KISS, BANG BANG
For almost 10 years Shane Black stood tall as one of the highest paid screenwriters in the history of cinema. But after the box office failure of THE LONG KISS GOODNIGHT Black virtually vanished from film. I’ve read interviews with Black where he speaks of a depression that set in over his place in show business and a need to get away from the buddy action films that had made him a success. It would be nearly 10 years after THE LONG KISS GOODNIGHT before Black would return, this time as both writer and director, for KISS KISS, BANG BANG. A film that shares much in common with LETHAL WEAPON and THE LAST BOY SCOUT but is also brand new territory for Black.
KISS KISS, BANG BANG partners up Robert Downey Jr. as a thief-turned-actor with Val Kilmer as a private eye who enjoys the company of men. The story has the duo caught up in a dime-store novel detective mystery but the plot is really just an excuse for Black to show everyone he still has the gift to write sharp, and often hilarious, dialogue. The film doesn’t have the relentless pacing of Black’s earlier work but what it lacks in automatic weapons it more than makes up for in charm. Black is essentially spoofing a lot of what made him successful but not in a SCARY MOVIE “Bash you over the head with a frying pan” way.
I’ve never been a huge fan of Downey Jr. but he hits all the right notes in KISS KISS. He’s asked to do an awful lot in this film and seems up to whatever challenge the story throws at him. Kilmer is equally good, if not better, as Gay Perry. In a year when BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN was seen as a landmark for gay characters in film it would be nice if Kilmer could have gotten some more praise for playing a guy who won’t let taking it up the ass get in the way of being a tough guy.
KISS KISS, BANG BANG was a relatively small studio film but even by that standard it flopped hard at the box office. Some of the fault lies with the studio, Warner Bros., who pretty much dumped the film in theaters with practically no advertising. But as much as I hate to say it, even if the movie had gotten a wider release I’m sure it would have tanked. It’s a very funny film but it isn’t a WEDDING CRASHERS-type funny and since both of the leads aren’t exactly box office gold, the general public was never going to give it a fair shot. That’s just the sad truth of today’s movie-going public. They’ll lap up all the SAW sequels and inspirational sports films but they’ll only put up with so many off-the-beaten-path movies before they’re begging for Adam Sandler to get kicked in the nuts while Drew Berrymore acts ditzy.
I can only hope that Black hasn’t taken the financial failure of KISS KISS, BANG BANG too hard. I’d like to think he’s already planning his next film, even if it’s just as a writer, that’ll stand proudly with his other works. I’d personally be interested in anything he has his hand in no matter the genre. Though I admit if he announced tomorrow that he was a penning a follow-up to THE LAST BOY SCOUT I’d take my enthusiasm one-step further and dance a jig that would make Michael Flatley look like the fraud we all know him to be.
Live from New York! It's Crap!
"Saturday Night Live" returns for an all new season this weekend. I remember back when I grew up with the show, in the days of Hartman, Farley, and Meadows (that's right, I singled out Meadows) it was always great to see the show return after the long summer off. These days I just don't care anymore. Obviously that's due in part to the fact that I'm older now and have access to all sorts of pornography which makes sketch comedy seem pointless. But the real reason I don't care anymore stems from the fact that the show is painful to sit through.The last time I watched a new episode of the show was a little over a year ago when Will Ferrell came back to host. I couldn't believe how bad it was and I haven't felt the need to revisit it since. Last season a lot of "SNL's" supposed highlights always found their way on the Internet right after they aired. I'd watch a lot of that selected ass and shake my head. Natalie Portman curses and raps! Amazing!
I know bagging on "SNL" is hardly original thinking. It has been going on in various forms since the original cast left over 25 years ago. But it's pretty clear that the show needs a real shake-up. Last week the cast was cut down for budget reasons with longtime players Horatio Sanz and Chris Parnell among those who got the axe. Sanz is no big loss, only Jimmy Fallon broke out of character more, but Parnell seemed funny at least from what I saw of him.
The best thing "SNL" could do to get back in the public's consciousness is start over with a mixture of proven talent and young unknowns. Take a page from the mid-80's when Billy Crystal and Martin Short did the show for a year and go after people like David Alan Grier, Jim Gaffigan, and even Fred Willard. That would do a lot to help the problems in front of the camera. As for the show's writing, I'm not going to pretend that I know how to salvage what the show has been serving up in that department.
Aside from that advice the only other suggestion I can make would be to let Robert Smigel do 90 minutes of "TV Funhouse" bits.
Law and Order...and Fletch?
Well, I think we can all rest now. Someone has found Chevy Chase and given him another job!!! After that whole "karate dog" debacle, I for one thought the man would never work again outside of public access or possibly headlining some Skinemax (ha, that never gets old, does Cinemax even exist anymore?) movie.
Apparently, Law and Order has chosen Chase to play a drunken celebrity who gets pulled over and goes on a racist tirade, but the twist is...wait for it...he may be involved in MURDER!!! (dum dum cue the L&O music). I guess the Law and Order writing staff is getting quicker and quicker in their ripped from the headlines turn around time. If I was Chase, I would be pretty flattered to be playing the TV version of Mel Gibson. Then again, if I was Chase, I would also probably be drunk a lot spouting my now famous anti-nerdbekistani slurs, so maybe he is the right guy for the role.
read more here
Apparently, Law and Order has chosen Chase to play a drunken celebrity who gets pulled over and goes on a racist tirade, but the twist is...wait for it...he may be involved in MURDER!!! (dum dum cue the L&O music). I guess the Law and Order writing staff is getting quicker and quicker in their ripped from the headlines turn around time. If I was Chase, I would be pretty flattered to be playing the TV version of Mel Gibson. Then again, if I was Chase, I would also probably be drunk a lot spouting my now famous anti-nerdbekistani slurs, so maybe he is the right guy for the role.
read more here
Shane Black Week: The Long Kiss Goodnight
I know I will get some grief for this, but Samuel L. Jackson's turn in "The Long Kiss Goodnight" is one of his most iconic roles. Moreso than hitman Jules in "Pulp Fiction", moreso than his "hold onto your butts" computer nerd/velociraptor meal in "Jurassic Park", and far moreso than his "I GOT EATEN BY A SHARK!" role in "Deep Blue Sea".
***Segway alert: Renny Harlin, director of "Deep Blue Sea" also happened to direct "The Long Kiss Goodnight". Suck it Knowles***
The Long Kiss Goodnight (TLKG) is your classic story of a single housewife/mother, who is slowly beginning to realize she used to be a CIA assassin named Charly Baltimore. Sam Jackson plays the private eye hired by "samantha", the housewife, to figure out some details about her past only to get caught up in the fireworks as Charly Baltimore/Samantha's old bosses find out she is a live and come back to put a bullet in her head. The story is actually quite a strong element in the film. Black's script does a great job of moving the story forward intelligently as the two leads go from clue to clue. The viewer actually cares about these characters and are actually a bit torn in watching Geena Davis' Charly/Samantha character make a choice in what life she wants to ultimately lead.
Now, the action in the movie is really really solid. Renny Harlin was fresh off his super bomb "Cutthroat Island", and re-teamed with his then wife Geena Davis for TLKG. Harlin has gotten a lot of crap over the years, but I feel his take on Die Hard 2 was fantastic, and he has another real gem in TLKG. The action is smooth, easy to follow, and exciting. Harlin puts together a lot of nice setpieces that showcase Charly Baltimore's skill at killing. I think the water torture scene will stick out for many as a real favorite.
When you watch this movie now, many people will see a lot of similarities to Kill Bill and/or La Femme Nikita. While the idea of a woman looking for revenge is not new, after seeing this movie I think you will lose a little respect for Tarantino's movie. I already felt that Kill Bill was too full of homage and lacked real substance. Seeing how well thought out and planned TLKG was, I disliked Kill Bill even more. Tarantino could have learned a real lesson from this film (especially on the action front).
I think coupled with a classic Shane Black script and Renny Harlin's above average direction The Long Kiss Goodnight is easily a contender for a slot in the "best action films of the 1990's" argument. A lot of people did not see this movie, and I think a lot of it had to do with "Cutthroat Island's" headline grabbing losses it caused the studio. People read about what a flop that movie was, and then you have the same director and same lead actress and you have built in negative PR. Luckily, we are far enough away from the 90s where none of that movie politics matters. I highly recommend this film if you are a fan of Black (many of his fans call this his best movie), a fan of Davis (she gives a great dual performance and looks quite good), or a fan of Jackson (his best role ever).
Favorite line in the movie: Sam Jackson's Character crashes through a blockade to get to Charly and her daughter yelling, "YOU CAN'T KILL ME MUTHA FUCKERS!"
Shane Black Week: Lethal Weapon
Editor Note: Chris wrote this some time ago, and since blogger's setup does not allow me to change the date it gets posted I just copied and pasted it here. Once again, Chris is responsible for this great read.
- Faze
When I was 22 I had recently graduated college and was working at a video store. When Shane Black was 22 he sold his script for LETHAL WEAPON for $250,000. On the surface it looks like Black comes out on top but I doubt he was able to rent GHOST DOG: WAY OF THE SAMURAI before its designated street date, FOR FREE! Once LETHAL WEAPON hit screens in 1987 it would mark the start of Black’s reign as one of the premiere screenwriters for the next decade.
The buddy action film wasn’t exactly an original concept in the late 80’s. The decade had already produced flicks like 48 HOURS, RUNNING SCARED, and (say it with me folks) FIREWALKER. But LETHAL WEAPON took the mold that created those films and shattered it into a million pieces. Who would have thought that a pairing of Mad Max with the guy who beat up Whoopi Goldberg in THE COLOR PURPLE could have such impact? But that’s what happened thanks largely to Black’s dialogue and a steady captain behind the camera in director Richard Donner.
The film works on every level. The action is terrific, there are tons of nice comedic bits (“DO YOU WANNA JUMP?”), and the characters are written with much more attention to detail than you usually see in the genre. But we can’t forget the bad guys. Gary Busey may actually be insane now but back when he did LETHAL WEAPON he was (mostly) acting insane. Often overlooked is Mitchell Ryan as General McAllister. Ryan is one of the those character actors who pops up all the time in films and television, usually playing kind or uptight old men. But in WEAPON he is the picture of evil. He’s the Dick Jones to Busey’s ED-209.
LETHAL WEAPON was a smash hit back in’87 and a sequel was inevitable. Black wrote a script and shockingly decided to kill Gibson’s Martin Riggs character off at the end. This didn’t fly with the producers who kyboshed that idea and handed his script over to be revised by new writers. Killing Riggs off would have been ballsy but I actually like the way part 2 ends with Glover trading jokes with a nearly dead Gibson.
After LETHAL WEAPON the buddy cop movies increased to dizzying degrees. Most were not very good and even the ones that were fun couldn’t quite match what Black already did. You don’t see as many flicks in the vein of LETHAL WEAPON because the premise has been destroyed by so many inferior knock-offs. I blame RUSH HOUR.
- Faze
When I was 22 I had recently graduated college and was working at a video store. When Shane Black was 22 he sold his script for LETHAL WEAPON for $250,000. On the surface it looks like Black comes out on top but I doubt he was able to rent GHOST DOG: WAY OF THE SAMURAI before its designated street date, FOR FREE! Once LETHAL WEAPON hit screens in 1987 it would mark the start of Black’s reign as one of the premiere screenwriters for the next decade.
The buddy action film wasn’t exactly an original concept in the late 80’s. The decade had already produced flicks like 48 HOURS, RUNNING SCARED, and (say it with me folks) FIREWALKER. But LETHAL WEAPON took the mold that created those films and shattered it into a million pieces. Who would have thought that a pairing of Mad Max with the guy who beat up Whoopi Goldberg in THE COLOR PURPLE could have such impact? But that’s what happened thanks largely to Black’s dialogue and a steady captain behind the camera in director Richard Donner.
The film works on every level. The action is terrific, there are tons of nice comedic bits (“DO YOU WANNA JUMP?”), and the characters are written with much more attention to detail than you usually see in the genre. But we can’t forget the bad guys. Gary Busey may actually be insane now but back when he did LETHAL WEAPON he was (mostly) acting insane. Often overlooked is Mitchell Ryan as General McAllister. Ryan is one of the those character actors who pops up all the time in films and television, usually playing kind or uptight old men. But in WEAPON he is the picture of evil. He’s the Dick Jones to Busey’s ED-209.
LETHAL WEAPON was a smash hit back in’87 and a sequel was inevitable. Black wrote a script and shockingly decided to kill Gibson’s Martin Riggs character off at the end. This didn’t fly with the producers who kyboshed that idea and handed his script over to be revised by new writers. Killing Riggs off would have been ballsy but I actually like the way part 2 ends with Glover trading jokes with a nearly dead Gibson.
After LETHAL WEAPON the buddy cop movies increased to dizzying degrees. Most were not very good and even the ones that were fun couldn’t quite match what Black already did. You don’t see as many flicks in the vein of LETHAL WEAPON because the premise has been destroyed by so many inferior knock-offs. I blame RUSH HOUR.
SHANE BLACK WEEK: IT BEGINS
I really have a feeling that our readership has not increased in the last 6 months, but I also get the feeling based on our rough site visit meter that we haven't lost too many readers either!!!
For those still reading, I thank you. I know we could talk about all the hot new TV shows of the season, but I have quickly realized that there are 95 million other websites and blogs that will do it better and in a more timely fashion than we can. I think TV is still an important part of this blog, and when any of us feel the need to chime in about a show we won't hesitate to. For example, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip is pretty fantastic, but I think everyone knew that already. Smith on CBS was actually pretty damn good too, and I don't know how aware of that people are. But I think the one show that has been the clear runaway favorite for this season has been The Venture Brothers. Each episode has raised the already high bar for comedy. It is simply the funniest show on TV right now. I highly suggest you guys check it out Sunday nights on Cartoon Network. AdultSwim.com will also show the newest episodes on their "Adult Swim Fix" service on their website (its free).
Another not so hidden cable gem is Monk. You would think the OCD gimmick would get old after so many episodes, but I can tell you this half season that USA aired over summer has had me laughing out loud on multiple occasions. I already talked about Psych earlier on this blog, and I still stand by it. It is simple a fantastic show and a perfect companion piece to Monk. Both shows should be coming back in January for the second half of their seasons. Be sure to watch.
Jericho is another CBS show that I would definitely push also. Although Skeet Ulrich constantly looks like he is coming off a cocaine high, the show itself has a great premise and seems to be well executed so far. It is definitely something I would like to see through till the end.
Anyway, keep on reading. If nothing else, I promise you will be entertained.
Without further adieu, I present to you Shane Black Week.
For those still reading, I thank you. I know we could talk about all the hot new TV shows of the season, but I have quickly realized that there are 95 million other websites and blogs that will do it better and in a more timely fashion than we can. I think TV is still an important part of this blog, and when any of us feel the need to chime in about a show we won't hesitate to. For example, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip is pretty fantastic, but I think everyone knew that already. Smith on CBS was actually pretty damn good too, and I don't know how aware of that people are. But I think the one show that has been the clear runaway favorite for this season has been The Venture Brothers. Each episode has raised the already high bar for comedy. It is simply the funniest show on TV right now. I highly suggest you guys check it out Sunday nights on Cartoon Network. AdultSwim.com will also show the newest episodes on their "Adult Swim Fix" service on their website (its free).
Another not so hidden cable gem is Monk. You would think the OCD gimmick would get old after so many episodes, but I can tell you this half season that USA aired over summer has had me laughing out loud on multiple occasions. I already talked about Psych earlier on this blog, and I still stand by it. It is simple a fantastic show and a perfect companion piece to Monk. Both shows should be coming back in January for the second half of their seasons. Be sure to watch.
Jericho is another CBS show that I would definitely push also. Although Skeet Ulrich constantly looks like he is coming off a cocaine high, the show itself has a great premise and seems to be well executed so far. It is definitely something I would like to see through till the end.
Anyway, keep on reading. If nothing else, I promise you will be entertained.
Without further adieu, I present to you Shane Black Week.
The Rapaport Report
It's been a while, my friends and enemies, but what with my Rapaport-less summer depression to get over it took three new episodes of The War At Home to finally get me back on my feet. As a first order of business, I'd like to get the issue of his name out of the way first. Is it spelled "Rapaport" or "Rappaport"? The answer: Both! The fact is, an actor of Rap's stature can have as many or as few Ps in his name as is his whim. Who's going to stop him? You? Don't make me laugh.
Anyway, this season of the show seems to have some changes in store. Hillary is a high school senior now, and visions of her possible future are invading. Will she finally crack down and take school seriously, or will she keep on slackin'? My guess is she will just get stupider and sluttier, and find success along that path. I mean, this is a show about America not Nerd-bekistan. Although, coincidentally enough, older son Larry is played by Nerd-bekistani thespian/prodigy Kyle Sullivan...ajad. Larry (or should i call him Gideon?) is going through some changes this year, with reinvention in his mind. But sadly his moniker change, his new attitude, and even his clothing can't disguise the real him, mostly because he's in high school and hasn't reached puberty. Maybe that will be the most important change we see in him this season, but somehow I doubt it. This young man's voice will be cracking well into his retirement years. Younger son Mike is a freshman in high school now, and his world is reeling. Should he stick to a long term relationship in hopes of someday getting to feel her up, or should he date around until he finds a girl who will let him round the bases right away? It's a matter of investment savvy, and at age 14 you can't expect a burgening sexual predator to find the easiest marks on his very first try, can you? Only Rapaport has the balls to ask these questions in prime time.
Speaking of our hero, how have Dave and Vicky been handling the changes in their kids' lives? With the proper mixture of frank honesty and problem-deteriorating lies. Hillary, you can't sing. Gideon, your name isn't Gideon. Mike, your virginity is shameful. Kids, stop bothering us when we want to have afternoon sex. Is the man ever wrong? Only when he admits he was wrong. Now last night's episode was mostly about Dave and Larry (and Kenny, glad to see he's back this season) going to a sci-fi convention. Dave felt rather uncomfortable there, and I think the show missed an opportunity in not focusing on how nerd girls use these events as excuses to get nearly naked, which might have been a good way for father and son to bond. Instead it relied on some jerky has-been celebrity not giving autographs. I blame everybody on the show but Rapaport for this reliance on cliche, but that's neither here nor there. During some of the inner monologue sequences, we see Rapaport in a superhero outfit, and that reminded me of something else he did this year which I haven't yet mentioned. Rapaport has indeed been keeping busy with film as well, one of which happens to be a unique take on the superhero movie. Special follows Rapaport as a possibly delusional man who believes he's a superhero, with powers improving everyday. Unfortunately, it seems it hasn't found a distributor just yet, but it's been moving around the festival circuit. The trailer can be found here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7NUzKPbMT7k . I suggest you watch it, and of course, keep watching The War At Home.
Anyway, this season of the show seems to have some changes in store. Hillary is a high school senior now, and visions of her possible future are invading. Will she finally crack down and take school seriously, or will she keep on slackin'? My guess is she will just get stupider and sluttier, and find success along that path. I mean, this is a show about America not Nerd-bekistan. Although, coincidentally enough, older son Larry is played by Nerd-bekistani thespian/prodigy Kyle Sullivan...ajad. Larry (or should i call him Gideon?) is going through some changes this year, with reinvention in his mind. But sadly his moniker change, his new attitude, and even his clothing can't disguise the real him, mostly because he's in high school and hasn't reached puberty. Maybe that will be the most important change we see in him this season, but somehow I doubt it. This young man's voice will be cracking well into his retirement years. Younger son Mike is a freshman in high school now, and his world is reeling. Should he stick to a long term relationship in hopes of someday getting to feel her up, or should he date around until he finds a girl who will let him round the bases right away? It's a matter of investment savvy, and at age 14 you can't expect a burgening sexual predator to find the easiest marks on his very first try, can you? Only Rapaport has the balls to ask these questions in prime time.
Speaking of our hero, how have Dave and Vicky been handling the changes in their kids' lives? With the proper mixture of frank honesty and problem-deteriorating lies. Hillary, you can't sing. Gideon, your name isn't Gideon. Mike, your virginity is shameful. Kids, stop bothering us when we want to have afternoon sex. Is the man ever wrong? Only when he admits he was wrong. Now last night's episode was mostly about Dave and Larry (and Kenny, glad to see he's back this season) going to a sci-fi convention. Dave felt rather uncomfortable there, and I think the show missed an opportunity in not focusing on how nerd girls use these events as excuses to get nearly naked, which might have been a good way for father and son to bond. Instead it relied on some jerky has-been celebrity not giving autographs. I blame everybody on the show but Rapaport for this reliance on cliche, but that's neither here nor there. During some of the inner monologue sequences, we see Rapaport in a superhero outfit, and that reminded me of something else he did this year which I haven't yet mentioned. Rapaport has indeed been keeping busy with film as well, one of which happens to be a unique take on the superhero movie. Special follows Rapaport as a possibly delusional man who believes he's a superhero, with powers improving everyday. Unfortunately, it seems it hasn't found a distributor just yet, but it's been moving around the festival circuit. The trailer can be found here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7NUzKPbMT7k . I suggest you watch it, and of course, keep watching The War At Home.
Barf = $$$
After a few quiet weeks of September box office returns, JACKASS 2 came to the rescue to take in $28 million over the weekend. This makes one thing quite clear. People love pubic hair.
I contributed my $9.75 to the JACKASS 2 pot and I feel no shame at all. It goes beyond the first film and is full of funny and stomach disturbing moments from start to finish. I'd go into greater detail but this is really a movie that begs to be seen without knowing all the great stunts and pranks beforehand. I'll say this though, 350 pound women should not appear on film naked.
Next weekend will continue the trend of movies designed to sicken their audiences. That's right, Ashton Kutcher is back on the big screen in THE GUARDIAN. Oh Kevin Costner, I hope you at least bought a solid gold toilet or something with the money you "earned" to do a movie with Kutcher.
And1 Mixtape GLOBAL INVASION
In case you have been living under a rock, the And1 Mixtape Tour has gone GLOBAL BABY. OH BABY! OH BABY!
Sorry for the digression, but its hard not to get excited when you take 10-12 guys from the hoods of the US and A and drop them in the middle of Europe and Asia where everyone treats them like they are superstars. The fact that you have all the classic And1 stars playing again makes this tour worth watching alone. Most notably, you have the return of the "Sauce". Hot Sauce has returned to the tour bringing his second to none dribbling skills. Shane the Dribbling Machine is there. The rare on court sighting of Escalade, who seems to get larger and larger by the day. 50, who is freaking hilarious in his quirks one of which involves bragging about all the articles that have been written about him, is on top of his game. Old stalwart 1/2 man 1/2 amazing. AO. Go Get it. Of course, you have the Professa. And some others who I can't remember right now. They are almost like a new age Wu-Tang in the amount of interchangeable members they have.
The on court action is great. But the off the court action is almost as entertaining. Seeing these guys experiencing life in a foreign country is often times very hilarious. One of my favorite exchanges had to be from the oldie but goodie 1/2 man 1/2 amazing. Basically, the locker rooms in the Italian stadium had the old style squat and squeeze style toilets. Needless to say, the guys were having none of that. Our boy 1/2 man dropped this suggestion to the Italians, "Yo Italy, you gots to up your doo doo game"
I smell a future position at the UN...or maybe just doo doo
Streetball: The And1 Mixtape Tour Global Invasion airs Mondays at 9 pm on ESPN 2. It also airs multiple times throughout the week on one of the ESPNs, check your listings.
Shoot 'Em Up: Actual Footage
I don't know exactly what the hombres over at LatinoReview.com do to get their exclusives, but they are pretty on top of the movie scoopage now that AICN has sort of just given up on movie scooping and just becoming a glorified message board with the occasional Harry Knowles rant.
LatinoReview first broke news about Michael Davis' (writer of Double Dragon: The movie!!!) long animatic that he showcased to studio execs to get money for his new movie idea. They actually put it up on their website and it got a lot of people talking. He basically combined the style of a John Woo shoot out with the kinetic pace of a Jackie Chan action sequence. Needless to say, I was excited about what I saw.
Now, LatinoReview has posted a promo reel with actual footage from the movie and hot damn! does it look good. It boasts a great cast and has a nice sense of style to it. I also very much appreciate the return of massive amounts of ammunition expenditure. American movies have been far too gun shy in the past few years. I like what I am seeing here. Take a look and tell us what you think.
Footage
NORM!
It's hard to top "Mentos Van Damme" but I'll give it a shot. Here's Norm Macdonald on a recent visit to "The Daily Show" discussing the tragic death of Steve Irwin.Macdonald has long been a favorite of mine since his days behind the "Weekend Update" desk. He was on "The Daily Show" to promote his new comedy CD "Ridiculous." I grabbed a copy as soon as I heard it was released and it saddens me to say that I wasn't doubled over in laughter all that much while listening to it. But whatever projects he can line up to justify appearances like this one on "The Daily Show" is fine by me.
MyTube: Best one yet
I think this clip needs no explanation. I do think that if I were to make a top 10 of youtube clips, this would be near the top. I would like to shake the hand of the man who made this possible.
P.S. Next week WILL be Shane Black week. I promise. Thoughts on Lethal Weapon, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, The long kiss goodnight, and the unfairly maligned Last Action Hero...and maybe Predator (he did star in it)
P.S. Next week WILL be Shane Black week. I promise. Thoughts on Lethal Weapon, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, The long kiss goodnight, and the unfairly maligned Last Action Hero...and maybe Predator (he did star in it)
Spike TV: Not completely worthless
No two ways about it, Spike TV is shit. I was looking forward to "Blade: The Series" and gave it a fair shot but it was horrid. I've heard it has gotten better as the season progressed but I can only hang with a show that dull for so long. I will give Spike TV this, they do provide an outlet for people too cheap (or perhaps too smart) to keep up with the latest in DTV action films.Tonight at 9 they'll be airing THE RUSSIAN SPECIALIST. It's the 2nd film directed by Dolph Lundgren and is far superior to the usual Seagal or Snipes DTV crap. The story is nothing new. Lundgren plays a guy whose family is killed by Russian mobsters. After he believes he has terminated those responsible he tries to assume a quiet life as an auto mechanic. But because this is a Dolph Lundgren film, he his forced to turn his back on that quiet life and resume bringing the pain to the Russian underworld.
It really is a well made film and at times a nasty depiction of revenge. Sadly, Spike will chop up some of the more gruesome moments but if you really want to see the blood hit the floor then go spend $3 or $4 and rent the flick. Doing that will also mean you can watch the film without an endless parade of Axe bodyspray ads that Spike will surely interrupt the flick with.
Can a Wayans Still Be Funny?
There are many signs that I am getting old. For starters I actually make an effort to watch the last segment of "60 Minutes" so I can catch Andy Rooney. No joke! That old fucker sees the world in so many humerous ways. In addition to that fact I know I am getting old because I can clearly remember when the Wayans family was viewed as cutting edge.Long before LITTLE MAN, WHITE CHICKS, and "My Wife and Kids" there was "In Living Color." When I was a young buck you just weren't cool unless you knew everything that went on during the previous night's episode of "In Living Color." Well now the most talented (I say that only because of THE LAST BOY SCOUT) member of the family, Damon, is shedding his fatherly image to start up "The Underground," a sketch comedy series premiering Thursday at 10 on Showtime.
I suppose this is Wayans' and Showtime's attempt at their own "Chappelle's Show" empire. I'm very skeptical as to if Wayans still has any creative juices in his tank. Good or bad this series is evidence that Showtime has no clue how to promote their original programming. The only place I've seen ads for "The Underground" is on Showtime. HBO always goes out of their way to make sure their original programming gets hyped all over the media. It's no wonder that Showtime's biggest show ever was "Queer as Folk." But that was about dudes who hump each other. Of course everyone would watch that. It involved actual gay sex. Between men! Wait until Andy Rooney hears about that!
I am aware that the photo up top shows Jim Carrey as Fire Marshal Bill. I was looking for a shot of Wayans from "In Living Color" but I came across that one and liked it better. Who knew there were "In Living Color" trading cards? I need to grab myself a Tommy Davidson rookie card ASAP.
Equal Opportunity NEEDS you!
Hey Guys,
My cousin Sameer Asad Gardezi, wrote his first short EQUAL OPPORTUNITY and it has made it to the Finals of the NBC SHORT CUTS FESTIVAL. Equal Opportunity will be playing on http://www.dotcomedy.com/ until Tuesday, September 19 at Noon. We need your help by clicking the link below, getting a first glimpse of the short, then voting by clicking the VISIT BUTTON (right side of the page).
Please send these links to everyone you know! All your help will be much appreciated! Thank you!
Click here for a direct link
http://www.equalopportunityfilm.com/
myspace.com/equalopportunityfilm
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm2304758/
Edit: I edited this a bit so it didn't offset the entire blog's format. Also, this is a pretty funny short. I would suggest voting. And it stars Tom Lenk of Buffy The Vampire Slayer fame!!!
Faze
Trailer: Flags of our Fathers
The last time Clint Eastwood directed a movie he won an Oscar and pulled the plug on Hillary Swank's life support. Talk about win-win. 2 years later Eastwood is back behind the camera with FLAGS OF OUR FATHERS. It's the story of the men who were forever immortalized in history by raising the flag on Iwo Jima during WW2.
I find it odd that this film is coming out in less than two months but only now is a trailer being released. It looks like it has the makings to be a stirring war film, though the influence of SAVING PRIVATE RYAN feels a bit thick. The fact that Ryan Phillippe has a major role is also disheartening.
The Trailer comes from a FLAGS OF OUR FATHERS fan site. It's only available in Windows Media right now. The film will hit theaters on October 20th.
GONNA FLY NOW
http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/national/1110AP_Rocky_Statue.html
One of the greatest injustices in Philadelphia history has just been righted. And seriously, what is up with these museum types? Normally, I see no reason to ever go to a museum, unless it chronicles rock and/or roll, football, or TV. I actually want to go to this museum because the statue is back in its rightful place, and you know what, if I go I am not even going to go in the museum. So take that you snobs.
I now anxiously await the return of the Statue of Liberty to its rightful place after that Viggo debacle from Ghostbusters 2.
Tom Yum Goong aka "The Protector" (2006)
The Weinstein's have been screwing over martial arts cinema for along time now. For whatever reason, they have this inherent need to buy up any hot Asian film product, hold onto it for a long time, allow the hype to die down, then unnecessarily re-edit the film and release it in the USA with no marketing campaign. The latest project (victim?) the Weinstein's are releasing is "The Protector" starring Tony Jaa. Now, most of Southeast Asia would recognize this movie as "Tom Yum Goong", Tony Jaa's follow up to "Ong Bak". The movie is currently the number 2 highest grossing film in Thai history.
So, The Weinstein Company is now releasing their edited version this Friday. First of all, could you pick a worse title than "The Protector"? Why would you want to associate yourself with a 1980s movie starring Jackie Chan and Danny Aiello? That "protector" was single handedly responsible for souring Jackie Chan on the Hollywood movie making process for almost 20 years. Although, it also gave him the impetus to make "Police Story", which basically redefined Asian cinema forever. So some good came out of it.
But as far as "The Protector" 2006 is concerned, the plot is pure shit. Tony Jaa basically chases down his pet elephant who has been kidnapped by an evil syndicate based out of Australia. The acting, the plotting, and all the non action stuff is a clear step backwards from "Ong Bak". It can be painful at times to watch this movie, which is why I am not that disappointed that it is being "tightened up" for American audiences. There is really only one reason you should be going to see this movie...the action.
Tony Jaa and Panaa Rittikari (jaa's mentor and action choreographer) are setting a new standard for martial arts cinema.
Jet Li and Jackie Chan are shells of their former selves. They are putting out a lot of crap in the twilight of their careers. I hope they are inspired by what is coming out of Thailand to actually make something of quality again.
I know that may sound surprising, but its no hyperbole. The action quotient is just exponentially higher in TYG/Protector vs. Ong Bak. Jaa is just friggin' unbelievable. The things he does are just awe inspiring and jaw dropping. The brutality that was very prevalent in Ong Bak's fight scenes is definitely preserved here. One sequence stands out in my mind as a instant competitor for best fight scene ever. Jaa fights a capoiera expert in a buddhist temple around the halfway point of the movie. The choreography is insane. The fight beats are just so perfect and on key. And, the guy Jaa fights looks a helluva lot like Eddy Gordo from Tekken. There are several other fights that are very memorable and just pure fun to watch, but keep an eye out for the temple scene.
If you like action movies, you will not be disappointed. The story can be grating and does actually detract from the overall experience to a certain extent, but I promise you will leave the theater feeling sore because so much ass is kicked by Jaa. Also, The RZA is composing a score for the movie, which I am actually pretty anxious to hear.
And for those curious, Jaa's next project will be "Ong Bak 2" directed by Jaa himself, but will bear no relation to Ong Bak's story. Apparently, it will be set in the old timey days.
GO WATCH "THE PROTECTOR" THIS WEEKEND.
Return of the Kings
Cash Money Records. I have always liked their product because they make no qualms about who they are and what they want. Flashy cars, flashy jewels, flashy "teef", flashy women. Most everyone else in hip hop today is just a walking contradiction. They are either poorly channeling gangsta rap of the late 90s (the game) or they are barely rappers and making a living off of nonsensical phrases (lil john).
Lil Wayne and Birdman have gotten back together for a full length album "Like Father, Like Son". The first single "Stuntin' like my daddy" is quite catchy and a great return to form. No one raps about rims and stuntin' like Cash Money. I was actually pretty surprised to find out Lil Wayne's last solo album went platinum. Birdman's solo effort wasn't as successful. It is good to see these two back together. Cash Money is like a Wu-tang Clan of sorts, but instead of Eastern philosophy they are all about western materialism. Others try, but these guys have turned urban materialism into a true art form.
I don't think this particular track is produced by Manny Fresh (if it was I would have expected at least 4 shout outs to him), but its pretty damn good. The video is directed by Cash Money vet Benny Boom and covers all the basics. My favorite scene: Birdman getting a tatt on his neck...while rapping. Truly a numba one stunna
Lil Wayne and Birdman have gotten back together for a full length album "Like Father, Like Son". The first single "Stuntin' like my daddy" is quite catchy and a great return to form. No one raps about rims and stuntin' like Cash Money. I was actually pretty surprised to find out Lil Wayne's last solo album went platinum. Birdman's solo effort wasn't as successful. It is good to see these two back together. Cash Money is like a Wu-tang Clan of sorts, but instead of Eastern philosophy they are all about western materialism. Others try, but these guys have turned urban materialism into a true art form.
I don't think this particular track is produced by Manny Fresh (if it was I would have expected at least 4 shout outs to him), but its pretty damn good. The video is directed by Cash Money vet Benny Boom and covers all the basics. My favorite scene: Birdman getting a tatt on his neck...while rapping. Truly a numba one stunna
Back Under the Knife
Last year was not too kind to "Nip/Tuck." Much of the season had been spent building tension as to the identity of The Carver and when all was said and done that mystery was resolved in about the most convoluted manner possible. With that plotline left behind (for now?) the show will be back Tuesday night at 10 on F/X for its 4th season premiere.I've never been a fan of medical shows. I think I've seen "E.R." twice in my life and "Grey's Anatomy" looks about as interesting as a preseason WNBA game. But "Nip/Tuck" got its hooks into me deep a couple years ago. It stretches basic cable to the limits and even with some of last season's laughable storylines it had plenty to offer in terms of juicy entertainment.
Obviously the show will continue to focus on the surgical and sexual escapades of Dr. McNamara and Dr. Troy. But backing them up is an interesting array of guest stars such as Richard Chamberlain, Brooke Shields, and liver abuser Larry Hagman. Also popping up at some point will be Rosie O'Donnell as a "woman" hoping the good doctors can remove the horns from her head. At this time it is not known whether Rosie will eat any of the major characters. Look out Kimber!
In Memory
'Crocodile Hunter' Steve Irwin--naturalist, animal activist, and good-natured television personality--was killed earlier today (Australia time) in a freak diving accident. He was filming an underwater documentary in and around the Great Barrier Reef when calamity struck, and apparently a stingray caught him in the chest. He is survived by his wife Terri and their two young children, Bindi Sue and Bob. He was 44 years old.
Little Miss Sunshine
Little Miss Sunshine is the debut feature from the directing team of Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris, who just happen to be married, and to each other at that. It's funny how the world works. Anyway, the film is in part a satire on the obsession with winning which drives so many little league fathers into the seedy underworld of referee-knifing, but it also turns out to be much more than that. It's also a charming, funny family road movie along the lines of the first Vacation movie, and a touching family observational drama with a knack for depicting both the tension and the affection that come with these family relationships. In other words, it's a movie about a family.So it's a family, we've established that, and they are on the road. But who are they? Where are they going? Why? Well, it's the Hoover family, on the road from Albuquerque to Redondo Beach in order for the young daughter Olive to compete in the Little Miss Sunshine children's pageant. She's been practicing for months with her grandfather, and though the Hoovers have been straining financially and emotionally lately, Olive's excitement (and a small motherly bribe to Olive's silent, recalcitrant, Nietzche-reading brother) gets them all into the family bus. Now I want to make it quite clear here that the characters here are not "quirky," they just happen to be detailed and well-drawn, so they stand out in comparison to cookie-cutter characters infesting, let's say, the still-unceasing flow of post-Ringu, post-post-Scream horror crapfests defiling the last decade or so. Sorry for all the hyphenates in that last sentence, but post-Ringu, post-post Scream horror crapfests really get my blood boiling.
So the writing was great, a large part of the success for the movie is due to the cast, every member of which hits the nail on the head. Abigail Breslin, best known for aceing the role of dear little Bo in Signs, plays Olive with surprising depth. The excitement, the nerves, the pressure, the delight: it all shows clearly in her face, beyond reciting lines. Greg Kinnear and Toni Collette play her parents, a loving but strained couple barely keeping above the financial waters. Paul Dano (L.I.E.) plays Olive's previously mentioned brother Dwayne, who's taken a vow of silence until reaching his goal of becoming an Air Force pilot. This might seem like a silly gimmick on paper, but in the course of the film it's played to perfection, with great humor and even ferocity. While everyone does a fantastic job, the two standout characters here are obviously Olive's grandpa (Alan Arkin) and her maternal uncle Frank (Steve Carell). Arkin's glee in playing a slightly debauched, vulgar old man is apparent from the start, but again the writing and the acting make the character more than the sum of its parts. There's not a line he says that won't perk up your ears. Carell is at his wry best as the gay genius Proust expert whose life has taken a series of downturns, leading to a recent attempt at suicide. He has a distance from the daily minutiae of the other family members that allows some outsider perspective to enter, and his interactions with success-obssessed Kinnear are a highlight.
As far as events along the way, it's a road trip movie so expect to see some roadblocks, figurative and literal. Those come with the territory, and are handled well because the characters make it so. Once again, I can't emphasize this enough, this isn't just another film with quirky characters thrown into a farcical situation together. Nor is this family the generic catch-all meant to represent all of America. It's a family of fleshed-out individuals interacting in a confined space along a goal-oriented journey, and since the relationships are always interesting, funny, maddening, saddening, and touching, the film succeeds in a big way. Also, the finale is one of the funniest film moments I've seen in years. Little Miss Sunshine seems to be gradually widening in release. Go see it. Make it a double feature with Crank, even.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)