South Park: Still Crazy After All These Years

It has almost been 10 years since "South Park" hit the airwaves. But unlike some animated comedies (cough, oh fuck the cough I'm clearly talking about "The Simpsons"), "South Park" still gets under skin with the best of them. The most recent fracas concerns last week's episode in which Steve Irwin is depicted attending Satan's Halloween party, along with the stingray that killed him still attached to his chest.

To be fair, the person who is most upset is Irwin's widow. I guess I can't blame her. If someone made fun of my loved one's death I'd be a bit steamed too. But anybody not related to the former hunter of crocodiles who feels offended should just cram it. Poor taste or not, the bit is extremely funny.

With all the new animated comedies that have popped up the last couple of years it's easy to forget how impressive "South Park's" run has been. This current season has had some classic episodes that have perfectly lampooned everything from online gaming to female teachers banging their male students. Now is definitely the time to rediscover the show if you have let your viewership lapse.

To check out the "Irwin incident" click here.

MyTube: JAMMX...the return of the bobb'e j

We recently commented on Tracy Morgan's new show "30 Rock"...its good. Watch it.

But Mr. Morgan had previously gotten a family sitcom on NBC, called "The Tracy Morgan Show", while the likes of me and worry loved it, NBC didn't believe in it. But there was one discovery in that show that not even NBC could kill...Bobb'e J Thompson. He played Tracy Morgan's youngest son...and he was hilarious. Apparently he has also been in a bunch of episodes of "That's so Raven". Anyway, not only does the kid own one of the wildest uses of the apostrophe ever, but he also is mad talented.

He has been part of Jammx kids music club or something for some years now. Apparently they are still making videos. Bobb'e J raps in it! Shaq Fu himself is in it too! Unfortunately he isn't rapping in it, but I remedied that by posting one of the "Diesel"s classics.

Beep Boop Beep Boop...

Even though we're still over 2 months away from the new season of "24," a trailer of season 6 has just become available. Those hoping to have "Day 6" revolve around Jack Bauer's quest to flee his Chinese captors will probably be pissed as it looks like that plotline will be wrapped up within the first hour of the new day. In fact it looks as though the obstacle facing Bauer will be of the Muslim variety which appears to be how this show likes to go for the even numbered seasons.

The show is coming off an Emmy win for Best Drama which is really sort of insane. I enjoy "24" plenty but it's not exactly the ideal destination for interesting characters or sharp dialogue. But no matter, as soon as this season finds Bauer stabbing terrorists in the throat I'll forget all about its faults and just concentrate on all the severe beatings he'll likely dish out.

The new season kicks off with a 2 hour premiere on January 14th. The trailer can be viewed here. For a look back at my favorite moment from season 5 click here.

From Deadwood to Die Hard

A couple weeks ago we reported, more like regurgitated, the news that Jeffrey Wright had been cast as the villain in LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD. It appears that deal either fell through or wasn't true because now several sites (still good enough for me!) are reporting that "Deadwood" star Timothy Olyphant has been tapped to play John McClane's main nemesis.

Olyphant's character is described as a mysterious figure behind an attack on the U.S.' computer infrastructure that begins to shut down the country. The character has planned out every angle to his scheme, except for the old-fashioned "analog" McClane. I suppose that means McClane will not spend the entire film at a keyboard eating Hot Pockets.

I've tried to get into "Deadwood" but it just hasn't clicked with me. It's not Olyphant's fault who does a nice job as one of the show's leads, I just find the pacing of the show beyond lethargic. I have enjoyed him in a few films like GO and A MAN APART so I'm optimistic that he can give Bruce Willis a decent run for his money. Though just as I said when it looked like Jeffrey Wright had the role, Olyphant is not the kind of name that's going to get people buzzing about the 4th DIE HARD. I guess it's just going to have to be an actual good movie.

MyTube: Diddy...what is wrong with you?

I am sure many of you have seen this now famous video blog of Sean "P.Diddy" Combs explaining how good it feels to take a piss. If you haven't...watch and then continue reading.



Ok, he just released a new video last week for the dropping of his new album (if a washed up producer/semi-rapper drops an album, but no one is there to hear it, does it make a heavily sampled sound?). What is wrong with this guy? He makes it sound like this is an impromptu thing, but then he took the time to have it done in black and white, professionally edited, and have that weird serial killer interrogation piano music play in the background? I also enjoy how he conveniently rubs his eyes when he states "it's like 3 in the morning". Please enjoy Diddy's feelings exposed.

VH1 Hip Hop Honors Class of 2006 Tonight

VH1's "Hip Hop Honors Show" has been one of my fave awards/music events of the past 2 years. The first one was really well thought out and put together by people who definitely understood the history of hip hop does not begin in 1995. They honored the early pioneers like Grandmaster Flash and even DJ hollywood, who wasn't even a rapper just a guy with big ass speakers in the back of his cadillac who put on block parties. Nelson George, resident intelligent black guy writer about hip hop, has an obvious hand in putting together these shows for VH1 and it shows.

I think the second show really knocked it out of the park though. The performances became more of a spectacle bringing together the old and the new. One of my faves had to be when Common, TI (the only guy who didn't belong there), and the Roots came out and paid tribute to Big Daddy Kane with a massive medley of his greatest hits.

youtube of the performance

This year's class is very impressive: Afrikaa Bambataa, the Beasties, Easy E, Ice Cube, MC Lyte, Rakim (!!!), Russel Simmons, and of course the 36 chambers of the Wu-Tang Clan.

I can't wait to see these performances. Check it out tonight on VH1 at 9pm or multiple times throughout the week in reruns.

White Men Can't Jump...but they can get away with tax fraud

Well, StealingCable favorite Wesley Snipes is at it again. This time he is fighting a corrupt government, who is accusing him of stealing millions of dollars that he undoubtedly gave to the poor. Only this time, it's real life, and Snipes is the poor. The IRS is accusing Snipes and his accountant of stealing something like 12 million dollars by filing fraudulent tax returns. On top of that, he apparently didn't pay any taxes between 1999 and 2004 (that's a good accountant!). This story makes me wonder why a 1990s action movie star, who is now one of the hot new direct to video commodities, needs to steal money? I mean the guy just released "The Detonator" (on video store shelves now!).

Anyway, I wish him the best. If this does go to trial, I think Snipes should channel some Nino Brown and drop this soliloquy on the masses (just replace drugs with taxes): "I'm not guilty. *You're* the one that's guilty. The lawmakers, the politicians, the Columbian drug lords, all you who lobby against making drugs legal. Just like you did with alcohol during the prohibition. You're the one who's guilty. I mean, c'mon, let's kick the ballistics here: Ain't no Uzi's made in Harlem. Not one of us in here owns a poppy field. This thing is bigger than Nino Brown. This is big business. This is the American way."


theSuperficial link

Save this Show: Friday Night Lights

After viewing episode 2 of NBC's "Friday Night Lights" I felt very comfortable calling it my favorite new show of the season. It manages to maintain a sense of realism without falling too much into sports movie cliche territory. All the characters are fully developed. Having the actor who plays Matt Sarecen, Zach Gilford, basically be the lead of the show is pretty gutsy. He actually looks like a goofy high school kid. Kyle Chandler is pretty fantastic as the coach. I believe that the townsfolk are actual townsfolk of a small town in Texas. But I think the most impressive part about the show is that when I watch it, I almost get fooled into thinking this is a documentary. Sure the shaky handicam photography can get a bit annoying, but it definitely gets the job done.

Anyway, this show has been basically killed by "dancing with the stars". So, I appeal to you, our 20 readers to start watching "Friday Night Lights" on NBC. It airs Tuesday nights at 8pm.

Mini Review: The Marine

THE MARINE attacked theaters this weekend and took no prisoners on its way to 6th place at the box office. But it's the #1 non-sequel, non-prequel, non-comedy, non-animated, non-remake film in the country. Go Cena!

I'm not going to waste too many words on this movie. It's dumber than a semi-regular Arby's customer. There's nothing original about it. It's also heavily watered down to maintain a PG-13 rating.

But I'm gonna say that I didn't hate it, and at times I even had some jolly good fun. Pretty much any positives to come out of this mess are thanks to Robert Patrick. He's obviously having a blast hamming it up as the villainous jewel thief Rome. I doubt we'll be seeing John Cena headlining another film, at least not a theatrical film, anytime soon but I hope we see Robert Patrick in larger roles in major movies. He does appear in FLAGS OF OUR FATHERS opening this Friday and is co-starring with Matthew McConaughey this Christmas in the football drama WE ARE MARSHALL.

The Tracy Morgan Show II (30 Rock)

Watch NBC's "30 Rock".

It is funny. It is Tina Fey's behind the scenes of a late night sketch comedy sitcom. Tina Fey is a serviceable writer, but a pretty poor actress. On top of that, she still has a lot of left over junk in her trunk from her baby bearing. She is not that funny in a sitcom setting, and she isn't that good to look at, excpet for playing "spot the screwed up cheek of hers".

There is one reason to watch "30 Rock" and it is TRACY MORGAN. It seems like Morgan gets a script with a general idea of what he is supposed to do, and then throws it out of the window and just goes wild tossing around conspiracy theories about AIDS in chicken nuggets and sex with strippers. It is Morgan at his best. I applaud Tina Fey for getting this guy on the show rather than some unfunny black comedian...*cough*DL HUGHLEY*cough*.

I hope we get to see more of "30 Rock" solely for Morgan's ad libbing. It's on Wednesdays at 8. I also think bravo will be rerunning it throughout the week like they do with all of NBC's other big shows.

P.S. Let me take this opportunity to reiterate how much I hate the Christian chick on "studio 60". Her on again off again romance with Matthew Perry's character is almost killing entire episodes. I mean come on Sorkin, having an ex walk in on his old lady making out with some other dude and when he tries to sneak away he runs into something causing a clamor? I think every TGIF show did that storyline already...9000 times.

Infernal Affairs: Redux (The Departed)

I saw Infernal Affairs today...except it starred a bunch of white people. This is just a message for all those falling all over themselves in adulation of Scorcese's latest film, "The Departed", "written" by William Moynahan.

THIS MOVIE WAS ALREADY MADE, AND IT ENDED MUCH BETTER.

I actually thought Scorcese was going to add something new, but instead the entire plot even down to the comedy bits was exactly the same, and the stuff they did change wasn't for the better. I expected more from "Marty", and you know what I wouldnt be surprised if this is the film that gets Scorcese his Oscar. And when he wins it everyone will say "finally he got one!!!", yea off the coat tails of a Andrew Lau, Alan Mak, Andy Lau, and Tony Leung. As far as the acting, Leo did a pretty good job, but he is no Tony Leung, who gave a freaking masterful performance as the undercover cop.

The other thing that bothered me is with all the press and hype surrounding "The Departed", only one person really gave more than just lip service credit to Andrew Lau and Alan Mak's "Infernal Affairs"...and it was Anthony Anderson. I don't know what that means.

Do yourselves a favor guys, go rent "Infernal Affairs" and give it a viewing. It is just done much better. Sure it doesnt have as much cursing in it, has subtitles, and the actors aren't dreamboats like leo and matt and marky mark, but it is just more enjoyable.

DVD Goodness: Black Rain

Hitting DVD this week is a "Special Collector's Edition" of BLACK RAIN. It's the gritty tale of 2 New York cops, played by Michael Douglas and Andy Garcia, who are assigned to transport a prisoner to his native Japan. What begins as a routine task eventually plunges these cops into a culture they know nothing of and a criminal underworld full of violence and mayhem.

The film really is one of those overlooked gems that seems to get better as the years go on. After FALLING DOWN it's my favorite performance from Douglas and the rest of the cast is all in top form. But the man who deserves most of the credit for its success is director Ridley Scott. He is able to take a relatively straight-forward tale of crime and revenge and, with help from a well written script, add layers to the characters that you don't normally find in films of this genre.

This new DVD, a welcome upgrade from the previous bland BLACK RAIN disc, includes an extensive behind the scenes look at the film from how the idea was developed into a script all the way through the editing process. A Ridley Scott commentary is also featured. Whether you've never seen the movie, or haven't in a while, this DVD is just the excuse you need to give it a look.

The Price is Right...For Bosoms!

I've been watching "The Price is Right" for as long as I can remember. Not everyday mind you, what kind of loser do you do take me for? But it's always nice on a rare holiday or on a day you call in sick when you're not really sick to get under the covers and spend an hour with Bob Barker, AKA an old man who has gotten plenty of ass but doesn't throw it everyone's face like that jerk Hugh Hefner.

I'll admit that when I'm able to watch the show I'm all business. There's always a lot of eye candy on display but I find it usually serves to distract me from my objective of correctly guessing the price of a cotton candy machine. So I'm glad somebody has put together a nice montage of some of the more jiggle-tastic moments that the program has long been famous for. Enjoy.

Shane Black Week/Month: The Last Boy Scout

Joe Hallenbeck: This is the nineties. You don't just go around punching people. You have to say something cool first.

If one quote could sum up Shane Black's "The Last Boy Scout", I think that would be it. TLBS may be Shane Black's most quotable script ever. I would just direct you to IMDB's memorabl quotes section to view the gems for yourself. I think its also probably Black's funniest script to date. He really went out of his way to jam tons of zingers for the two main protagonists, Joe Hallenbeck and Jimmy Dix, and a lot for the villains as well.

As for the movie itself, I think it can be considered a nice bookend piece to Shane Black's career in the "buddy action genre", for which he is often credited as the guy who perfected it. Its funny because if you look at his filmography, Black has only really written a handful of movies. Before TLBS, he had only done Lethal Weapon, Monster Squad (he has stated the film bares little resemblance to his script), and Lethal Weapon 2 (plus a ton of uncredited script doctoring). He definitely gave it his all here.

The movie itself probably would never work without Bruce Willis as private dick Joe Hallenbeck. I can't think of another actor in the world who can play the "calm, cool, collected smart ass, who gets beat up a lot but still comes out the hero". He did it wonderfully in the Die Hard Series. He does it masterfully in TLBS. I think Black's quips were almost tailor made for Willis deadpan delivery. If anyone else tried to say them, like say a C. Thomas Howell, it would come out very very bad and I mean "Soul Man" bad. I definitely put Joe Hallenbeck up there as one of Bruno's greatest roles.

Next, lets touch on the enigma that is Damon Q. Wayans. What the hell happened to this guy's career? The guy is fantastic in TLBS. I am sure a lot of it had to do with the script, but the guy is a solid actor as well. I remember when he left "In Living Color" there was a lot of buzz about what he was going to do and after TLBS and "Mo' Money" came questionable material like "Blank Man" and the uber horrible "Major Payne". Wayans' turn as Jimmy Dix, disgraced pro football star, was really quite excellent. Its easily his best role on film. My favorite line would be this one:

Joe: Where you going?
Jimmy: The bathroom. Doctor told me not to lift anything heavy, you wanna help?

As far as the actual movie, its your classic Los Angeles story involving crooked senators and football team owners trying to get gambling legalized only to have a washed up private detective and ex-football star stumble into the situation. There are some very nice set pieces (it is a Shane Black script after all), which are pretty well directed by Tony Scott. He seems to have controlled himself a bit more in this film and sort of let the scenes play out without adding in jump cuts and all the MTV crap he does now.

Overall, "The Last Boy Scout" is probably one of my favorite films of the 1990's, even though it was released in 1991. It really didn't do as well as it should have at the box office, but isn't that always the case with movies like this. It really is quite a gem that I would highly recommend to anyone who enjoys quality action movies.

Smith, We Hardly Knew Ya!

The new TV season is still in its infancy and already the rookie shows are dropping. That happens every year but usually the first shows to get axed are ones you could see coming a mile away. The biggest casuality so far is "Smith," CBS' crime drama that boasted an impressive cast including Ray Liotta and Virginia Madsen.

I liked "Smith." It wasn't groundbreaking and I'm sure I'll be able to go on with my life Smithless but it was an entertaining show and one of the few new shows I've watched more than once. "Smith" is a good example of what can happen to a serialized drama if it doesn't catch on quick with the networks. Shows like "Lost" and "24" are the exception to that rule. It would be great if a cable network like Spike, since like CBS they're owned by Viacom, could show whatever episodes of "Smith" are in the can but I won't hold my breath on that happening.

Meanwhile NBC has dumped its drama "Kidnapped" to the Saturday graveyard where it will finish out its run. There has also been a lot of talk as to what to do with "Studio 60," which continues to lose viewers as the weeks go by. Though with all the talent and money that NBC has devoted to "Studio 60" I don't see it leaving the airwaves without a huge effort being made to get it seen by as many people as possible.

As for the cast of "Smith," Liotta fans like myself can look forward to seeing him in the sure to be a blast film SMOKIN' ACES due out next Spring. I don't know what Vrginia Madsen has lined up but rest assured I will continue to fantasize about showering with her while her brother Michael watches us. Good times.

McClane Gets a New Foe

LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD, the next entry in the DIE HARD series has been filming for a couple weeks but only now has the villain been cast. Though not officially announced, several sites (good enough for me!) are reporting that Jeffrey Wright will be in charge of making John McClane sweat, curse, and hopefully shoot many people.

Wright is a good actor and when compared to a lot of the other aspects to this sequel it's about the best news I've heard. Still, I was sort of hoping an actor would be cast that would really get me excited. For some reason my mind was telling me James Gandolfini would get the gig. He was never rumored or anything, but I just had a vision of him in a DIE HARD film. Most of my visions involve James Gandolfini so it's probably my problem.

That picture to the left is a shot of Willis on the set of LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD. I swear to God it is not a picture of Robert Schimmel.

MyTube: House of Horrors/Carters

Shane Black week will continue with my thoughts on "The Last Boyscout" hopefully later today, and if I am feeling up to it, bonus thoughts on "Predator". I know I could comment on how intriguing/annoying "Heroes" is (that cheerleader chick needs to go), or how entertaining "Jericho" has been, or how engrossing "Studio 60" has been, or the far too obvious reminder about "Lost" returning tonight, but after seeing this leaked clip from E!'s new reality juggernaut "House of Carters" I think I will definitely be watching this show. Enjoy...

(Thanks to The Superficial.com (fantastic site btw) for the heads up)

Good Cop, Better Killer

Showtime has been hit or miss with me when it comes to their most recent shows. "Brotherhood" turned out out to be a decent drama, and somehow got renewed for a 2nd season. On the flipside their is "The Underground," an utterly terrible attempt by Damon Wayans to do shocking sketch comedy. Tonight at 10 PM they'll premiere "Dexter," which seems to have the potential to be a rather original cop drama.

"Dexter" stars Michael C. Hall of "Six Feet Under" as a Miami lawman by day and serial killer by night. The twist of the show comes from the fact that his victims are criminals themselves who have managed to evade the justice system.

I like the idea of the show and hope the execution is just as good. I never watched "Six Feet Under" so I really have no expectations, either good or bad, when it comes to Hall. I'm mainly just looking for a cop show that won't bore the hell out of me and help pass the time until "The Shield" comes back in the (fuck!) spring.